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Thread: Is he depressed or done

  1. #11
    Platinum Member
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    Well I'm just guessing that for one thing, your boyfriend is probably still in pain. Pain can really put someone in a very low and despairing mood. It's just there niggling at them all the time and there might be not much the person can do about it, so it's very hard. Also if your boyfriend is suffering from depression, you have to realise that depression is not actually about you. It's an internal thing and not related to how that person feels about you. It's common for people who are depressed to not act as enthusiastic anymore. He's not even actually pushing you away though because he's still reaching out to you and including you in his life.

    I think don't make it about you and be supportive and understanding. If your boyfriend sometimes needs space, then give it to him. If you're there for him now, hopefully he can pull through this and get back to his usual self eventually.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    If you truly like this man, then let him know that you are there, and you will continue to support him. But also ask him to please let you know when he needs time to himself or when he wants your company. He is the one going through a very difficult time, so he is the one who would be able to tell you what would be best.

    Try to be gentle right now. Don't push. And try to not take things personally. How he is acting, isn't about how he feels about you or related to you. He is trying to accept a new reality and that can take a lot of time. It's confusing, upsetting and will take time to process. He will have good days, but he will also have bad days.
    That's to be expected. Let him know what it's okay and that you will still be there for him no matter what kind of day he is having.

    I realize this is a confusing time for you too. It's hard not to take it personally and it's upsetting that things were going well and then this happened. It's sad on your part too.
    Take time for yourself, you also need to process the changes. But don't lose hope either.
    This is all new for both of you and you both need time to adjust to everything.

    The only time you need it will for sure be over, is if he says it's over. But for now, this truly is about him not coping well with a traumatic situation.
    Be his friend, be his comfort, and support. Try to find ways to cheer him up. He will really appreciate you for it.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Yes. You need to let him rest and spend time with his family, friends, those who take care of him as well as the other healthcare personal who he needs right now.

    Unfortunately someone as insecure as you stated you are, is draining and too much work for someone trying to recover from multiple trauma.

    It would be best for you to step way back so he and his people can attend to his recuperation.

    Use this time to attend to your own issues and get your own mental health in order.
    Originally Posted by Dtot
    Should I step back on contacting him and wait for him to call me?

  4. #14
    Administrator kamurj's Avatar
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    Multiple accounts are not allowed. Thread closed.

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