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Thread: meeting guys

  1. #1

    meeting guys

    Hi everyone,

    I hope you are doing well. I have a weird question to ask. One of my very good friends (we call each other sisters) has no trouble meeting guys as friends or dating (especially dating) and it always seems like this is true because she just seems to hang out where there are lots of guys. There never seem to be many guys when I go places and I always wonder why when I go places I never see/meet many guys, like my friend. Is it because I just don't where the right places to go are? Or does it have to do with me personally? If it's the first problem, then where should I go/what places should I hang at?

    Thanks!

  2. #2
    Platinum Member SooSad33's Avatar
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    I doubt YOU going places and not seeing many guys has anything to do with you.

    Not sure your age, but many guys like bars.. or hang around coffee shops ( at least in my area).
    May depend on age groups- I am unsure.

    How about school parking lots.. skate parks? - again all depends on age.

    How about you ask your friends where she hangs out? ( Or maybe her actual intentions?).
    IF she is just some sort of player, she can plan to make sure there are plenty around, where she goes. ( IMO).

    I Knew a few like that. I wasn't like that though. I would hang with a few friends and did not favour the bars much. I learned the hard way, that I am not a fan of alcy's.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Where are you going to meet guys? Do you work/go to school? Do you belong to any clubs, groups, sports or volunteer? Do you smile, say hi and engage in small talk?
    Originally Posted by Surfergirl12
    Hi everyone,

    I hope you are doing well. I have a weird question to ask. One of my very good friends (we call each other sisters) has no trouble meeting guys as friends or dating (especially dating) and it always seems like this is true because she just seems to hang out where there are lots of guys. There never seem to be many guys when I go places and I always wonder why when I go places I never see/meet many guys, like my friend. Is it because I just don't where the right places to go are? Or does it have to do with me personally? If it's the first problem, then where should I go/what places should I hang at?

    Thanks!

  4. #4
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    Can you hang out with her and go where she goes? Maybe observe how she interacts with people and see what it is that draws them to her?

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    When I was in junior college, I joined the ski club. Plenty of guys in that, and was invited to parties by some of its members. Like previously said, you could join a club. You could play on a co-ed sports team. If you're a surfer, you should be meeting guys by doing that, or does your moniker mean you're only surfing the net?

    I knew a couple who met when they each volunteered at the zoo. Get yourself out in the world doing fun things. Not that there are any guarantees in life, but you might meet better quality people who are enjoying volunteering and are passionate about a hobby versus guys in bars. Good luck.

  7. #6
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    Originally Posted by Andrina
    When I was in junior college, I joined the ski club. Plenty of guys in that, and was invited to parties by some of its members. Like previously said, you could join a club. You could play on a co-ed sports team. If you're a surfer, you should be meeting guys by doing that, or does your moniker mean you're only surfing the net?

    I knew a couple who met when they each volunteered at the zoo. Get yourself out in the world doing fun things. Not that there are any guarantees in life, but you might meet better quality people who are enjoying volunteering and are passionate about a hobby versus guys in bars. Good luck.
    Volunteering is great. I know a lot of couples who met volunteering back and front stage for community theater. Also apples and oranges - people are individuals and when they meet other individuals there are so many factors that can influence whether they click and how.

    Here's what I would do similar to this post. Be in environments where people are generally sober and where talking to people is part of the natural environment. So think - book clubs, swing dancing, team sports, classes at a gym, hiking groups, singles events, religious organizations that have singles events if you are part of a religion - but remember a lot of this is covid-dependent right now.
    Women can introduce you to single men -their friends, coworkers, relatives, etc. So meet people -not just men.

    Work - people you don't work closely with or supervise or who supervise you. Go to happy hours unless it's a drunken mess, go to professional events, etc. I originally met my husband at work.
    Tell everyone you like - and respect -that you would be interested in being set up with a single available guy who is looking for a potentially serious relationship. Meet those people. Set people up with other people and they will return the favor.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    It sounds like those guys may be her friends or friends of other male friends, not of any romantic interest or anyone she'd be interested in dating.

    Your best bet is finding your own volunteer and interest groups and hanging out with a crowd that you feel comfortable with.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    I don't think it's so much a question of 'place' as it is comfort level. It sounds like she naturally gravitates towards hanging out with guys, genuinely enjoys their company, and one of the perks is that she has automatic dating options.

  10. #9
    Silver Member ShySoul's Avatar
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    How old are you? If you're young, don't worry about it. There is plenty of time to "meet guys."

    There's no set place to meet someone and no rule for how many guys you should be meeting. People can meet each other anywhere. There is also the matter of personality. If she is more outgoing and extroverted, she'll be more inclined to meet people in general. If you're more shy or introverted, there's nothing wrong with that. But it doesn't matter how many you meet. You can meet a dozen people and nothing works out. Or you can meet one person and hit it off. What counts is meeting the right kind of person, someone you connect with. So don't think about it. Focus on doing what you like. Join a club or group for something you're interested in. As has been said, volunteer. You'll naturally be meeting people with whom you already have things in common. You'll have a natural jumping off point for friendships or possibly more. And even if nothing comes of it, you'll be having to much fun to care.

  11. #10
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
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    No-one can possibly answer your questions when you don't provide relevant information.

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