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Thread: Should I Say Anything

  1. #11
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    I think the more important issue is not so much of what their conversations consist of, but the fact that he's hiding it from you. Once the trust is broken there's no turning back, (imo).

    Either way if you choose to stay, he'll more than likely find better ways to cover his tracks. Are you up for that?

  2. #12
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    You've already got the proof, they are spending much more time together than he is willing to admit to. Asking him won't change that fact.

    They are obviously still very much emotionally connected.

    You need to be asking yourself what are you going to do about it? Stay and hope and pray it changes? Walk out, knowing he's not being loyal? Keep pretending it's not happening and telling yourself it might not be real?

    He and she are close, they are spending time together when they think they won't be caught out. Your phone bill proves that. You're the one who needs to figure out if you're willing to take it, or not.

    But rest assured, this man lies, he's already proven that to you. Asking him won't give you any honest answers.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    They definitely have unfinished business, and they are still into each other...I doubt she's really seeing someone, she's just using that to get him jealous to flush him out. After two months of this...deal breaker...boot him to the curb...he doesn't make a good BF.

    He has been very upfront with you??? better rethink that quote.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    My ex referred to HIS ex as "the psycho". He was sleeping with her every time I wasn't with him.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    My own private rule is that I won't involve myself with anyone who's still involved with an ex, in any way, shape or form, beyond shared children. You're learning WHY.

    You have information you're afraid to use on a guy you don't trust. The reason you have the info is because you already suspected that he was untrust-worthy.

    So now you have your proof. What does it tell you?

  7. #16
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
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    I'd break up with this guy and remove him off my plan. Why do this to yourself? You deserve better.

  8. #17

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    I appreciate all the very insightful things that you have all shared. I do want to say that I honestly do not have a problem with the fact that he talked to her my problem is with the lie. Even though they donít share a child he did become a very integral part of her sons life. He was upfront with me in the beginning about this and I respect that. But my issue is that he denied speaking to her recently. I do feel like I need to back off and move on. The trust has been broken and I donít think itís mendable.

  9. #18
    Platinum Member SooSad33's Avatar
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    Pfftt.. cant stand her? Yet they flirt? They are playing mind games.

    Since YOU pay his phone bill- which I dont know why you are doing so- since you have only been involved a short while, i would probably look too.
    Proves he's lying.. dont ya think?

    He speaks with this woman- who is overbearing way too often. Only thing between them should be re: the kids.

    If you cant trust him, i feel you should just move on.. dont get in the middle of their squabbles & crap.

  10. #19
    Silver Member ShySoul's Avatar
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    Healthy relationships need to be grounded in honesty. He lied about talking to her. You are not being fully honest about looking at the phone bill. You need to work things out and talk about it. Otherwise, you won't be able to trust each other. It's already bothering you, so if you don't say anything it will continue to eat at you and poison the relationship. You won't believe him when he talks about his ex. And you'll be tempted to keep "spying" on him. The only way to help things is to have it out and let your feelings be known.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    You're right. The problem isn't his ex, it's him. He lies, he says nasty things about "you are just like my ex", etc

    It's time to consider that you really don't know who he is today. It's not about "respecting this" or "understanding that", you're not a social worker.

    It's about not dating men who lie and get verbally abusive at the drop of a hat. Take care of yourself. Get him off your phone plan. Send him back to his ex.

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