Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 19

Thread: Needing opinions

  1. #1

    Needing opinions

    My boyfriend will borrow money from me, and sometimes a lot. He always tells me I have to remind him to pay me back. Absolutely no one else has to remind him to pay them back. Iím the only one that has to remind him. If I donít, then he will conveniently ďforget ď . He pays every one else back with no problem. Opinions please, thank you

  2. #2
    Super Moderator Capricorn3's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    14,907
    Stop giving him money until he pays back ALL the money he owes you. He said to keep reminding him. So, keep reminding him until he starts paying back. If he doesn't come forth with the money owing then you know exactly what he's really about - a user and a moocher. That's your cue to pack up and leave as he's showibg you his true character and he won't change (imo).

  3. #3
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    10,716
    So your biggest gripe against a boyfriend who seemingly makes a habit of borrowing money from multiple people is that he pays them back quicker than you?

    I mean you could print out a page of all of us saying he should be paying you back quicker and without solicitation, but at the end of the day you'll still have someone on your hands who's-- at least by your account-- a pretty notorious mooch. And insofar as you're cool with that, I'm not sure what great results you're otherwise expecting.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    23,303
    Why are you dating someone who never has any money?

    How much does he owe you? Do you pay for the dates?

    Dude sounds like a loser!

  5.  

  6. #5
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    7,130
    Stop lending him money if this is how he acts in repaying.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    23,203
    Gender
    Female
    You're not at his mercy on this. Put conditions on it.

    Next time he asks to borrow, ask him when he intends to repay, and tell him that it's on him to remember to repay by that day. If you need to ask him, you'll never lend him money again--and if he doesn't agree, you won't lend this time, either.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    52,149
    Does he have a computer or phone or device? If so he's capable of setting reminders for himself to repay you. Or he can write it on a to do list. I have both for things I need to remember so that I have a backup, especially if someone is relying on me (i.e. to call, to get something done). He's burdening you unfairly. And you're allowing it -why?

  9. #8
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    17,184
    Gender
    Female
    He hasn't had to face any consequences, therefore he'll run with it until he strikes out. He knows exactly what he's doing but you're allowing it.

    Of course you already know this...

  10. #9
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Location
    California
    Posts
    11,229
    Gender
    Female
    He borrowed money and puts you in the position to enforce the responsibility of paying it back?
    Is he this manipulative in other areas?
    Asking people to honor agreements and keep their word is uncomfortable, assbackwords and they know it.
    How convenient is it if you aren't paid back, he's now likely made it all your fault?

  11. #10
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    Ontario Canada
    Posts
    6,736
    Gender
    Female
    "NO" is a complete sentence! You should try it.

    He's a moocher and you need to stop lending him money. If he still owes you money, you say NO next time he asks. Point out he needs to pay you back the debt before you will think about lending him more.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Videos


Maintaining A Strong Relationship

Detaching From a Malignant Man

Divorced Parents Prefer Technology and Social Media As Communication Tool

Wedding Jitters Could Be a Predictor for a Future Divorce

Botox Fights Depression And Makes You Feel Happier

Men Are More Sensitive than Women when Having Relationship Problems
Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •