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Thread: I don't know what is normal anymore

  1. #21
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Originally Posted by Antares37
    The weird thing is I've always had a great relationship with my dad. He had no idea until just over two years ago. Until then, we were best friends. I know he idolises my daughter and she lights up when she sees him. It's breaking my heart to keep them apart. Of course I will do whatever I have to in order to protect her, but I just feel so full of grief. I couldn't care less if I never see my mother again. Im convinced she knew about the abuse and is railroading my dad now too. Then again, is he not accountable for his own reaction to this too. It was bad enough that they chose him over me, but now it appears they are choosing him over their granddaughter too. I just don't get it. We are their biological daughter and granddaughter. He's a sex offender. My head and heart hurt. :(
    It is best to cut them off.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    New Jersey
    Originally Posted by Antares37
    Thank you. Yes I'm starting to question their motivation alright. I'd a message from my dad basically saying that he didn't think we could sort things out without shouting but that he missed his granddaughter and would I / my fiancÚ drop her into him for an hour now and again. My reading of this message is basically "I don't care about patching things up with you, I only want to see my granddaughter so give her to me". I replied "not while you have a known sex offender dropping into your house on a casual basis, there needs to be some boundaries and some respect for me for once". He hasn't replied. I feel torn in two with grief. Him and my daughter have always had an amazing bond. She lights up when he comes into the room and he adores her. I feel this will break his heart, but I also want him to make a stand and listen to what I want.
    Why not turn the table and ask him to come and see her? If he won't do that, then you can tell him that you can see how much he really wants to step up to the grandfather plate, and he's in no position to blame you for that. If he ever changes his mind and wants to visit, your door is open.

    Then it's on him, not you.

  3. #23
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    you have no choice but to protect your daughter.

    She is a child and depends on you to protect her.

    living next door to a place where a known sex offender and predator visits is no better than what your parents did to you.

    I feel for you and understand why you feel so betrayed. that's why I'm calling it out to hopefully say some strong enough words to make you see how easily she could fall victim.

    its not just being in the house. it's being in proximity. how could you risk it? this sweet innocent child just playing in the yard could fall victim. because he's not a stranger. she would not have her guard up at all.

    you need to move so that she is not just easy pickings for a monster.

    I would bet you were not his only victim. how will you feel if 20 years from now, she comes to you with a similar story? what will you say? how will you be able to look her in the face?

    wake up.

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