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Thread: Tom's Journal - Becoming the man I've always wanted to be

  1. #241
    Silver Member Dalesboy's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Jibralta
    I think you should (somewhat forcefully) put that away and focus on other things.

    You will definitely lose perspective if you continue to loop back to C. Remember, you're ruminating over her because you have a habit of unbalancing yourself, and not because she's a great girl or anything like that.

    You're not missing out on anything. There's no secret combination to unlock. You're not doing anything wrong.

    Doing your hobby work is a drag, I get it. You may actually be reverting to rumination as an escape from the boredom of doing a job you don't want to do. Be careful of that.

    Sometimes when I have to do a job that I don't want to do (which is often lol!), I have a trick I play on myself with time that makes it a little more tolerable.... but I can't remember how it goes right now, lol! I'll try to remember it today...
    Thanks Jibralta

    I was more thinking about the whole contacting her end of next week regarding 'thoughts'.....but perhaps you have raised the more important issue that needed to be said about putting things aside.

  2. #242
    Silver Member Dalesboy's Avatar
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    I managed to get my work done this morning, and I'm just enjoying an hour or so before I'm doing some online teaching.

    Amazon fire stick arrived, the fire is lit.... feeling cosy!
    [Register to see the link] [Register to see the link] by [Register to see the link] , on Flickr

  3. #243
    Silver Member Dalesboy's Avatar
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    We have had the most amazing day!!

    It was Lass's birthday, and with the weather forecast fairly decent, we headed back to the Lake District, and revisited my most favourite place in the world!
    Ennerdale in the Western Lakes, where I had many a happy childhood holiday.

    [Register to see the link] [Register to see the link] by [Register to see the link] , on Flickr

    [Register to see the link] [Register to see the link] by [Register to see the link] , on Flickr

    [Register to see the link] [Register to see the link] by [Register to see the link] , on Flickr

    [Register to see the link] [Register to see the link] by [Register to see the link] , on Flickr

    Honestly can't remember the last time I've had such a great day!

  4. #244
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Gorgeous!!

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  6. #245
    Silver Member Dalesboy's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Jibralta
    Gorgeous!!
    It really was, and although I'm lucky where I do live, I so wish I was back there right now.

    It was good I decided to go, as it is looking very likely that England is going into a four week lock down. Schools look to be staying open which is good (I'd prefer to be in teaching, than zooming from home).

    Of course my thoughts turned to meeting up with 'C' and how unlikely it could be in the current circumstances on a social level. However, if the lockdown is to be lifted after four weeks, I will offer for us to do something in December. Could be quite nice to do something near Christmas.

    I'm not messaging yet, wait until we know for sure what is happening with the lockdown etc (as nothing is official).

  7. #246
    Silver Member Dalesboy's Avatar
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    Currently sat by the TV waiting for the Prime Minister to make his lockdown announcement..... was supposed to be at 17.00, now looks to be 18.30.

    Treated myself to a chippy dinner. Felt like a treat!

  8. #247
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
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    What absolutely beautiful photos, DB. An extraordinary place indeed.

  9. #248
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    I know you are trying to lose weight but it seems like you use food as a reward. Can you try to use something else as a reward? How about buying new (smaller) clothing or an electronic device you've been wanting?

  10. #249
    Silver Member Dalesboy's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    I know you are trying to lose weight but it seems like you use food as a reward. Can you try to use something else as a reward? How about buying new (smaller) clothing or an electronic device you've been wanting?
    Itís a fair point. Since Iíve started my injections I donít look at food with the same emotional connection though.

    Iím going to need some new jeans though! My oldest hoody is too big (which back in August was the only one that fit me) and has now been resigned to the charity shop.

  11. #250
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Dalesboy
    Itís a fair point. Since Iíve started my injections I donít look at food with the same emotional connection though.

    Iím going to need some new jeans though! My oldest hoody is too big (which back in August was the only one that fit me) and has now been resigned to the charity shop.
    I only brought it up because several times you've written that you "treated" yourself to a high calorie food as a reward. So it seems you still view food that way, not as something you need to survive but something that makes you feel good.

    I love food too, but I learned (when I was heavier) that I had to view it as a means of survival rather than a prize for good behavior. And to only eat when I'm hungry, not as a form of entertainment when I'm bored or just because there's something good in the fridge or pantry.

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