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Thread: Need advice for girlfriend troubles

  1. #1

    Need advice for girlfriend troubles

    Where to start...iv been with my girlfriend for about two years now normally everything is all good and as of last summer(July 2019) we came into some money to get our own place together. The problem is for the past year she’s the one that sets the moving date but never sticks to it on her end. She always makes up an excuse that she’s sick or has some family issue to fix or something is wrong. It’s always the same thing and it always happens the day we have everything set to go. Then recently iv found out certain things about her from her friends and when I confront her about these things she STILL tries to hide them from me. So idk how to talk to her about some of these things. What should I do with this situation? I don’t feel that she’s using me or lying to me but my friends think something is up. Please help

  2. #2
    Platinum Member
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    What is it she’s hiding from you?

  3. #3
    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    What is it she’s hiding from you?
    Stuff about her kids she’s got two little girls. They live with her exes family and she’s been trying to get full custody of them but she’s always telling me she has them with her when their not. She also hid the fact that her and her “roommate” dated a few years ago and I don’t know the guy like that either she won’t let me meet him

  4. #4
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
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    It is very simple, OP. She does not wish to move in with you.

    "She always makes up an excuse that she’s sick or has some family issue to fix or something is wrong. "

    The end of this road is in sight, OP. You don't need these complications.

  5.  

  6. #5
    Originally Posted by LaHermes
    It is very simple, OP. She does not wish to move in with you.

    "She always makes up an excuse that she’s sick or has some family issue to fix or something is wrong. "

    The end of this road is in sight, OP. You don't need these complications.
    That’s where things are complicated...she shows me proof of everything she’ll take pics at the doctors or show me messages from her family. So I can see she’s not lying to me but it’s like I’m tired of waiting around her family doesn’t live that far from me at all so there shouldn’t be problems

  7. #6
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
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    Beside the point, Fox:

    "she shows me proof of everything she’ll take pics at the doctors or show me messages from her family. "

    She does not wish to move in with you, I repeat.

    Something IS up, and well you know it.

  8. #7
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    Originally Posted by foxmaster300
    She also hid the fact that her and her “roommate” dated a few years ago and I don’t know the guy like that either she won’t let me meet him
    You’ve been with her for 2 years and you’ve never met her roommate?

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. Where do you live now? Where does she live? Did you buy a place together? How often have you visited her home?

    Why doesn't she have custody of her kids? Was she a teen mother? Where is the father? Are there drug problems? Does she work? It seems odd that she isn't leveling with you.
    Originally Posted by foxmaster300
    Stuff about her kids she’s got two little girls. They live with her exes family and she’s been trying to get full custody of them but she’s always telling me she has them with her when their not. She also hid the fact that her and her “roommate” dated a few years ago and I don’t know the guy like that either she won’t let me meet him

  10. #9
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Put the brakes on and don't panic. If you don't move the relationship forward it doesn't go anywhere (this means buying anything except lunch or maybe dinner together). Leave some time for the both of you to figure things out and let the custody issues sort themselves out.

    The photographs and lies are manipulative, as are all the failed expectations and lead ups to nowhere. I hope you realize this. Keep telling yourself that you shouldn't be with a woman who manipulates situations for any reason.

    Always remember that you can't lose someone whom you were never meant to be with in the first place. If she's not the right person, so be it. Be willing to cut your losses and make peace that she's not the one for you.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Something doesn't add up and she sounds like a flake. She is mysterious to the point of disturbing. I'd feel uneasy just as you are because she's hiding something. If you're uncomfortable with your girlfriend after 2 years, your relationship with her is abnormal and definitely not blissful.

    Either get clear cut answers and schedule commitments from her or ask yourself how much longer you're willing to have no changes in your relationship. Then you determine which trajectory is right for you.

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