is he really over me?

I dated this guy for over a year and it was our first serious relationship. We spent almost everyday together but he broke up with me early 2020 because we argued over little things. We still hung out after the breakup for months and went out, kissed, said we loved each other, etc. He blocked me randomly and cut off all contact over the summer. I reached out to him a month later to see what was up. He said he was far from feelings, is dating someone better, I was toxic, and told me to move on because there will not be a second chance. Some of my friends follow him but he never posts about any girl. What sudden change happened and is he truly over me or just angry? Will he come back?

Sorry to hear that. You don't want someone back who treats you or talks you like this. The best thing to do is stay no contact and delete him and all his people from all your social media and messaging apps.

He blocked me randomly and cut off all contact over the summer. I reached out to him a month later to see what was up. He said he was far from feelings, is dating someone better, I was toxic, and told me to move on because there will not be a second chance.

He broke up with you. He blocked you. He told you straight up that he doesn't like you, thinks you are toxic. He told you he is in a relationship with someone else.

What more can a guy possibly do to get the message across to you that he is not interested in you?

Time for you to let go for good. As for kissing and so on after the break up - please don't EVER do that to yourself again. When someone dumps you, move on and go no contact. Have more self respect than to chase after someone who doesn't want to be with you. Put that energy into finding a guy who thinks the world of you instead. This guy very clearly isn't it.

All that hanging out post break up was basically you hoping to get back together while he was using you to get over you...and did.... Don't do that ever again. It's over means it's over - when someone dumps you, they lose the privilege of your company, friendship, etc.

You have a good point. His actions/words speak a lot, but I was stunned by how quick he moved on, and how much anger he has in his messages. I am not sure if this is a rebound or real tbh. Either way, I guess time will tell.

This man is not wanting a relationship anymore. There may or may not be another girl, but either way, he's not doing it to make you jealous. He's doing it to make a point.

He wants you to know that he is wanting to move on.

I don't think there is any other way he can say this to you, other than what he has.

Losing a relationship is hard and can be upsetting. But at some point you have to come to acceptance and let it go.

Try not looking to see what he is up to or asking friends about him. It will only keep you 'stuck' and not moving on. Try to see it now as an experience, but is now something from your past and will never be again.

You will be helping yourself by accepting that it's over and not thinking about him again.

What were the reasons for the breakup? Whatever you do, don't consider an on/off situation.

You have a good point. His actions/words speak a lot, but I was stunned by how quick he moved on, and how much anger he has in his messages. I am not sure if this is a rebound or real tbh. Either way, I guess time will tell.

You have a good point. His actions/words speak a lot, but I was stunned by how quick he moved on, and how much anger he has in his messages. I am not sure if this is a rebound or real tbh. Either way, I guess time will tell.

Doesn't matter if this is a rebound or anything else. It's over. Tho he was harsh, he spoke his truth to you and you have to accept it. Work on forgetting about him and moving on in your life. Dont contact him.

It doesn't sound good. He's moved on so best to respect that. Treat yourself to people who treat you better and hang out more with those who uplift you, add to your life, inspire you. This is bottom of the barrel and you don't deserve it. If you need to do some work on yourself, focus on that. Don't look for attention from him anymore.

Keep your chin up and enjoy the rest of the summer. Hang out with other friends. Don't jump into any relationships if you're not ready.

"He said he was far from feelings, is dating someone better, I was toxic, and told me to move on because there will not be a second chance."

What do you not understand about this? He wants nothing to do with you.

When you break up with someone you don't still kiss them and say you love them. That gave you the impression there was more happening then he probably wanted. No wonder, you were still acting like a couple. If you breakup, make it a clean breakup.

You are better on your own and not dealing with this game. Focus on yourself right now and enjoy life on your own.

He cut off all contact over the summer. You are the one who reached out to him. He had no intention of talking to you again. So him telling you to move on isn't gasp "all of a sudden", he blocked you, he stopped talking to you for a month! That's pretty darn clear it's over. All the hanging out and stuff, was him having a hard time to quit you. Well he finally did.

break ups are a mind set. How quickly you get over them depends on you and no one else. If you allow an X to make you mad its because you allowed them to. If your X is causing you pain or their actions are confusing you its because you are allowing it. You said it is your first serious relationship and use this as a chance to learn from it. Learn how to let the relationship go. Change your mindset.

Let me answer your biggest question. How did he get over you so quickly? .. He was over you and had already emotionally detached from you BEFORE the break up happened. So by the time the break up happened, he was mentally and emotionally ready to move on. But don't let that upset you because not everyone you meet or date is going to be the one you end up with. You might end up dating several guys before finding the right one.

So now you have room in your life for someone new. This is how you should look at the break up. He had his chance and time to move on. Remember, life and love are not a race. It does not matter who found a new person first. What matters is that you find happiness. Let this guy go, and look forward to a new relationship with someone new.