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Ending family relationships


Seraphim

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My father and my grandparents are now gone. I don’t have any strong ties to anybody in my paternal side of my family. My dad has two sisters that I am not close to. I had a cousin on my father’s side who took me off Facebook at the beginning of Covid because of my anxiety about it. The day of my father‘s death she tried to re-add me blaming Facebook for our being dropped. 🙄 Most likely I won’t re add her.

 

After my father’s will has been fulfilled I think I will just block all of them.

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It might feel gratifying to block people now but you may need to take a break from facebook overall or social media. It is ok to do that. I think social media is interesting more for our relationship with the app itself (or apps themselves if in the plural) rather than the relationships we have with people in general. If you feel obligated to put on a front or continue to act normal or put on a good face for everyone, it is actually ok not to and to take a break completely. Sometimes there's a lot of confusion and stress about what's best to do in front of our friends and family and those are the last people we should be worried about, assuming things about us or thinking badly of you if you don't act a certain way. It's ok to take a step back and not even be there or as active or log on.

 

I don't think you should have to worry about this right now or the poor behaviour of someone else and how they treated you back then. Be with yourself and give yourself time to grieve or say your goodbyes in your own way.

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I have to stay on the App because of my business page. My cousin I just won’t re add her most likely I think it’s rude for her to send a friend request the day my father died. And at the beginning of Covid when I was upset basically she put a post on my wall that said what the hell are you even worried about you’re not going to get it so calm the hell down and then shortly after that I noticed she was no longer in my friends list. And then she tries to re-add me the day my father dies? Yeah, crappy behaviour. One of my father’s sisters I live 20 minutes from her and I’ve seen her once in 10 years. And the other one I know even less. Really they are just all a memory of really bad lineage. I would just block all their phone numbers and everything about any of them.

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You're reminding me totally why I've denounced social media... so sorry you have to deal with this especially now. Best to leave her off then. Maybe all this marks the beginning of a new chapter for you, one where you can start over without these people in your life anymore.

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I can relate. Sorry that people don't live up to our expectations sometimes. I've had a lot of supportive people reach out since my mom died two weeks ago. I wish it wasn't overshadowed by certain relatives who haven't phoned, messaged, or sent me a card like one aunt and four cousins have failed to do. I can't fathom how they became so insensitive, and we've always gotten along and have long family histories where we had been involved in each others lives, positively. I'll be doing some extractions from my life as well. I wish I could learn to not let it bother me, but humans aren't robots, devoid of feelings. Stay strong!

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I can relate. Sorry that people don't live up to our expectations sometimes. I've had a lot of supportive people reach out since my mom died two weeks ago. I wish it wasn't overshadowed by certain relatives who haven't phoned, messaged, or sent me a card like one aunt and four cousins have failed to do. I can't fathom how they became so insensitive, and we've always gotten along and have long family histories where we had been involved in each others lives, positively. I'll be doing some extractions from my life as well. I wish I could learn to not let it bother me, but humans aren't robots, devoid of feelings. Stay strong!

I am so sorry for your loss. ❤️

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Andrina, I'm sorry for your loss. And I'm also sorry that sometimes people don't come through when they should. This should be a time of coming together. Try to focus on all the good ones who are helpful. I'm sure they will outshine the few bad apples in the bunch.

 

Seraphim, no need to keep negative influences in your life. Just because someone is blood, doesn't make them family. If you will be happier blocking them and not having contact, then that's the right thing to do.

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