The insignificance of Me (rant and whine post)

Have you ever thought about how insignificant you really are in the big scheme of things? I do this quite a bit, and it's a new thing for me.

As an independent, self-aware being, I never really saw just how minimal of an impact I had because I was so enthralled in my own actions and feelings.

Every issue I encountered would feel like my world was ending.

Why was everything so against me?

Nothing is against me. I am against me. The world doesn't throw things at me to deliberately make my life difficult, things occur and often I am affected by them.

I'm a small, temporary piece of this world. The only life I know, and will ever know is based on what I do in this life. Sounds stupid, but it's often overlooked. I don't get a second shot at this. This is it. This is my one and only life. The wiser I get, the more I realise that I have to do what I want to do, otherwise I may never get the opportunity to do it. I have to work towards being the person I want to be. Living the life I want to live.

I get so caught up in small moments of my life that I forget about everything else. I have to live for me, for my moments, for my dreams, for my life.

I'm insignificant to most people, but that enables me to focus on myself, on those who matter to me as I matter to them. It allows me to live my life in whichever way I wish to.

I live for me.

Sorry to hear that. You seem stalled out in ruminating and obsessing. The best thing you can do for yourself is get to a doctor. Too many people suffer without ever knowing why or getting the appropriate help.

They stay stalled in depressive existential thinking like this. Avoiding day to day problems by trying to figure out your place in the universe is an example of this.

Have you considered volunteer work, so that you can focus on others?

Yes, of course. There are plenty of things much bigger than you. That's the great thing about life. We are not the center of it so assuming to be would be ridiculous and delusional. :)

What I've found useful is picking great ideas and things much bigger than me to work on and adding to whatever fabric that is whether it's focusing on another area of work, volunteering, picking up challenging texts or other items that I can decipher or that teach me something about history, culture about people or the world - past and present.

I'm also a huge fan of exercise and getting moving. When you move and you get out there you also come face to face with the incredible awesomeness that is nature. There certainly ARE much, much bigger things than you moving in tandem in the universe in remarkable time.

I'm wondering how Wise and Holly's words land with you. Think there's something in both those posts that you might give some thought to, in terms of the limits of ruminating (strangely comforting as it can be) and how focusing on others can disrupt that cycle a bit.

Can only speak for myself, but it's what I love about this site, and where it provided tremendous comfort and rocket fuel for me, in getting out of my own way a bit. When I washed up on these pixilated shores I was like a racehorse with those blinders on—really focused on myself, my hurt, running toward it, analytical scalpel drawn. Seeing how "not alone" I was in that removed the blinders, brought more than my own hurt into focus by diminishing its value, to me. Food for thought, there in the cupboard for snacking.

I find a lot of comfort, personally, in the fleeting nature of things, including myself. The "insignificance," you could say, from one angle. I like riding my motorcycle because I feel like a speck of dust, like living around and getting lost in gargantuan natural phenomena (a churning ocean, mountains, desert) because it sort of does the same, reduces me to a state of giddy awe in everything that is not me. But I don't much like the word "insignificant," because if you think about it? It's a human construct—like all words—that requires a similar level of self-involvement (even self-debasement) as saying you are "significant." It's a way to assign meaning to yourself in a moving world, and inside your human skin, one that carries a whiff of inflated negativity.

What are you doing, right now, to get out of yourself? What, in the past week, has served to remind you that being alive is an incredible thing, "insignificant" as you (and I and Obama and Plato and red tailed hawks and...) are on the universe's scales? I try to let questions like that drive me, and when I slip up for stretches and lose sight of them? That's just life telling me to get curious again. Can only speak for myself, but I think curiosity is significant and is the path toward finding a sense of significance, specks of dust we all are, in the end.

I figured out along time ago that yeah, I only get one chance at life, one time to go round and do whatever it is I do. So I really need to be doing what works for me and I try to do that. I dont consider myself insignificant but in the grand scheme of things I guess we all are. 80 or so years on this planet is not long at all, it's really a blip.

So yeah, do what works for you, think positively about yourself, dont be so down and hard on yourself.

Yes, I've had insignificant thoughts about me but I don't dwell on it.

My husband and children need me, I do my best to keep our household afloat and we're so busy surviving day to day that I don't preoccupy myself with my insignificance. Sure, I might for a few seconds but I'm so immersed in what I have to do daily that I don't stop and think about my insignificance.

Don't care what other people think. Live your own life, take care of your health, surround yourself with moral people and feelings of insignificance will not enter your mind or not as much anyway.

Thank You all for your advice and thoughts on the matter. :)

I don't dwell on how small I am in the grand scheme of things, I have just come to the realisation that life is short and focusing on myself and those that truly care for me is okay. I've always focused so much on how others perceive me, when in reality the most important person I should care for is myself.

I'm not upset by how "small" I am, but amazed by how big the world is. There are so many people, places, things I am yet to see, experience. That is awe inspiring to me. My world doesn't revolve around what I experience in my everyday life, because there is so much more to the world than just me.

I guess insignificant is the wrong word for it, because for me my life is very significant. But also knowing that to most my existence is unknown is thrilling. It's an adventure to propel me into new experiences, new people.

I hope this makes sense.

I too worried about what others thought about me and I realized that they really don't care. People are very busy with their own lives so I do my own thing, too.

"It is a sad fate when for a man to die too well known to everybody else, and still unknown to himself." ~ Frances Bacon

"To thine own self be true."

We are the one who has to life with our-self 24 hours a day, no matter what. What other people think or do not think of us is not something we can control and is colored by there own perceptions and biases. So why worry about it? All we can do is control our own actions and strive to be the best "me" that we can. I've always felt different then those around me, like I didn't fit in. I don't tend to have the same interests, the same way of looking at things. I was even once advised on how I should change my image. But I've always known that I can't really be anything other then the person I am. And instead of being upset by it, I take pride in it. I try my hardest to be a good person, to help others. I like what I like, and I believe what I believe. As long as it doesn't hurt others, there should be no problem with that. And anyone I would want to associate with, should be able to see that and respect me for me.

Where I struggle is watching those who treat others with disrespect seemingly get aware with it and even rewarded for it. I can handle bad things happening to me ... I've had enough practice. I just can't stand watching someone else be hurt and how it often feels like the victims are blamed as much as the perpetrators.

Thank You all for your advice and thoughts on the matter. :)

 

I don't dwell on how small I am in the grand scheme of things, I have just come to the realisation that life is short and focusing on myself and those that truly care for me is okay. I've always focused so much on how others perceive me, when in reality the most important person I should care for is myself.

 

I'm not upset by how "small" I am, but amazed by how big the world is. There are so many people, places, things I am yet to see, experience. That is awe inspiring to me. My world doesn't revolve around what I experience in my everyday life, because there is so much more to the world than just me.

I guess insignificant is the wrong word for it, because for me my life is very significant. But also knowing that to most my existence is unknown is thrilling. It's an adventure to propel me into new experiences, new people.

 

I hope this makes sense.

BINGO. Enjoy the journey!

Yes, of course. There are plenty of things much bigger than you. That's the great thing about life. We are not the center of it so assuming to be would be ridiculous and delusional. :)

 

What I've found useful is picking great ideas and things much bigger than me to work on and adding to whatever fabric that is whether it's focusing on another area of work, volunteering, picking up challenging texts or other items that I can decipher or that teach me something about history, culture about people or the world - past and present.

 

I'm also a huge fan of exercise and getting moving. When you move and you get out there you also come face to face with the incredible awesomeness that is nature. There certainly ARE much, much bigger things than you moving in tandem in the universe in remarkable time.

Exercise -especially outdoors -is what I was going to mention - I feel very significant in the sense of how much I challenge my body, how much I challenge my mind to motivate my body -against the backdrop of nature (all outdoors since March because of covid; I exercise every day). Volunteer work and generally helping others also gives me great perspective . Been doing volunteer work regularly since the early 1980s.