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Thread: Long distance and intimacy

  1. #41
    Join Date
    Jul 2020
    Originally Posted by SherrySher
    Yes, Vzhx. He should be treating you as someone special and happy to hear from you and have you in his life.

    You should be romanced by him, as in love letters, sweet messages, small gifts that made him think of you, long chats that make you feel connected to him and none of it should be about sex at all.
    He should also have enough self control that he is spending his time doing other things other than porn and masturbating.

    If he's not making you feel special or important and you're forcing yourself to do things you're not comfortable with, in order to prove to him that you matter or are attractive, then you are in the very wrong relationship.
    Thank you SO MUCH ❤️
    So my relationship with him does have all the pampering and stuff.... and no sex at all...
    Obviously cause of the distance
    We talk everyday and since the last few days he has been stressed about his studies...
    but he still makes time to listen to my problems and help me out
    I was freaking out cause I thought my sex life was dying
    And when @wiseman2 said ďLearn to think more of yourself than an alternative to porn and something to masturbate toĒ it was a real eye opener

    Thank you too, for showing me how the other dynamics of the relationship matter more

    Since the last few days he has been studying but extremely stressed about when the exams might be held

    Thank you for showing me how the other dynamics are more important and that this might just be a phase Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #42
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Honestly, I didn't say it was just a phase. I don't think he's a good boyfriend and I do think he has a addiction to porn which will continue.

    Men who have the need to masturbale while watching porn, to the degree that your boyfriend is doing, usually have very bad sex lives. They seem to need/want porn in order to get aroused and stay aroused. Being satisfied with just you (his girlfriend) won't be enough.

    Nevermind the fact that he is changing sex from something that should bring you closeness and intimacy to another human being, now to something that is more about perversions and making it as cheap as possible.

    In my opinion, I would walk away from this guy.

    However, at the end of the day, it is your choice. We here on this forum can only give you advice and to tell what we see as wrong and not working, and what to watch our for, based on what you've told us.

  3. #43
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Is he open to video-calling with you again, OP?

  4. #44
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Cloud Nine
    Ok, leave it at that, he's stressed. Do Not Videochat. Simply pull back, try to solve your problems with friends and family and let him study for his exams.
    Originally Posted by Vzhx
    We talk everyday and since the last few days he has been stressed about his studies... but he still makes time to listen to my problems and help me out


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