Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 26

Thread: Moving in with your partner, different tastes?

  1. #1

    Moving in with your partner, different tastes?

    Hi all,

    Me and my girlfriend of 3 years have bought a house and are moving in together. We have never lived together before and im now realising we have completely different tastes. She wants absolutely everything in the house to be matching. From the plates, lamps, curtains, door knobs, etc all have to be completely matching/same color. I have a large blue picture which I want to bring into our house and she says it wont match anything because there is no blue in the house. So she doesn't really want it in the house, unless its somewhere where no one can really see it. My mom bought be a red mug which my girlfriend says wont match anything so she doesnt think it should come with us to the house (the other mugs/plates etc all have decor/furniture and everything she likes is different to what i like. We were given a really nice coffee machine as a moving in gift which i love, but nope we cant use it, apparently it doesn't match the kitchen! It makes me think im not going to be very happy living with her, but i dont know maybe im being dramatic. I was wondering if anyone else have been in similar situations and have any advice? thankyou

  2. #2
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    53
    Posts
    38,058
    Gender
    Female
    Same between me and my husband for the past 27 years living together. 🤦♀️🤦♀️ He just has no clue of style . Haven’t solved it yet.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    40,040
    Gender
    Male
    Bring your stuff and hang it, use it wherever, whenever you wish. Stand up, it's your home too.

  4. #4
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Heaven
    Posts
    795
    Gender
    Male
    hmm she will love a challenge when you do what you like as long as you stay away from arguing on her tastes and styles. Give your opinion don't argue but let her decide :)
    Women are always right an old saying but is still true.

  5.  

  6. #5
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Location
    Europe
    Posts
    2,272
    Gender
    Female
    OP. As Wiseman said it is YOUR house too.

    Did you not have any input while the interior decor was ongoing? Don't tell me this is another "my way or the highway" sort of person!

    Anyhow, where taste is concerned nothing is written in stone. I would find everything the same colour absolutely boring. Imagine, for example, pink doorknobs, pink plates, pink curtains, pink walls, pink lamps.

    You remark:

    "everything she likes is different to what i like. "

    Watch out, OP, soon she'll be wanting your underwear to match the walls, and worse still will start buying it for you. LOL.

  7. #6
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2020
    Posts
    59
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by LaHermes

    Watch out, OP, soon she'll be wanting your underwear to match the walls, and worse still will start buying it for you. LOL.
    LOL, thanks for the laugh :)

    I agree it's a bit excessive. She could handle this more delicately especially about the red mug bought by your mom...

  8. #7
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    4,779
    Gender
    Male
    Tough one.

    Can't help but ask: Three years together and you're only now seeing where your tastes are different? The long process of deciding to buy a house, talking about what that would ideally look and feel like, and none of this ever surfaced? Just seems perplexing to me.

    As for how to handle this? Like others, I think it's important for both of you to remember that this is a shared adventure—your house as much as hers—and have a little talk about making sure that's understood, and that you want there to be space for both your tastes to coexist and merge into one awesome thing. This is the moment to set the template about what works for both of you, so the house is a home, not a battleground.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    23,180
    You are sharing a house together. You should certainly be able to put up your own stuff.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Location
    Europe
    Posts
    2,272
    Gender
    Female
    OP you should indeed be able to have your own stuff in the house.

    "So she doesn't really want it (the blue picture) in the house, unless its somewhere where no one can really see it. My mom bought be a red mug which my girlfriend says wont match anything so she doesnt think it should come with us to the house "

    It is all so petty.

    Again I ask the same as Bluecastle:

    "Can't help but ask: Three years together and you're only now seeing where your tastes are different? The long process of deciding to buy a house, talking about what that would ideally look and feel like, and none of this ever surfaced? Just seems perplexing to me.
    "

  11. #10
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Location
    Europe
    Posts
    1,432
    Gender
    Male
    Dude, you should have known when you move in with a woman you have no say anymore. It's common knowledge, everybody knows that, even me!

    Stop thinking about it, just say yes all the time! everything will be fine!

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Videos


Maintaining A Strong Relationship

Detaching From a Malignant Man

Divorced Parents Prefer Technology and Social Media As Communication Tool

Wedding Jitters Could Be a Predictor for a Future Divorce

Botox Fights Depression And Makes You Feel Happier

Men Are More Sensitive than Women when Having Relationship Problems
Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •