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Thread: Hello. I need some friendship advice..

  1. #11

    Join Date
    Nov 2019
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    Look listen to your heart if you really want her back in your life then approach her and if you don't want her back in your life then ignore her. To win a girl heart you need to be patient. Girls expects love and care. You just need to be understanding and calm to win any girl heart.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    OP, a lot of friendships from high school and so on die off in college. Why? Mostly because people go through massive personal changes, personal growth even if not always for the better, etc. It sounds a lot like this is what's happened here. You two came to a fork in the road and she went left and you went right and now, you just don't get along anymore like you used to in the past because you are quite different people.

    Probably best to let this fade out and let her deal with her life. Rather than you chasing this friendship, let her come back if she ever wants to and find you.

    I'd focus more of your effort in finding great friends in college, new friends because quit often those friendships and bonds formed stay longer stronger. Seek people who are more like minded.

    Almost all of my close friends from high school and I went to the some uni. We all drifted apart in different directions within one semester. At the same time, the friends I made in grad school are friends for life. Life changes, people change - you have to learn to accept that and move forward instead of looking backward.

  3. #13
    Member katyfran45's Avatar
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    Jun 2019
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    @DancingFool you got a good point. I think I will be letting her go. No reason to start up more drama and I would rather not hear any more excuses or lies. It hurts, but I will get over it and find better friends.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    You seem to be trying to force a friendship with this girl who doesn't seem all that interested. You should never have asked to stay at her place, she may well have lied about her roommate not wanting you there, because she didn't want you there! Stay in a hotel.

    I agree with others that times are rough and will continue to be for who knows how long. People are tense and not as relaxed as normal. I think you should focus on other friends who are actually friends.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    A pandemic is not the time to propose staying with anyone, much less take it personally if someone is not on board with that.

    You sound overly invested in turning this friendship into something you envision rather than respecting the limits of the person with whom you're dealing.

    If that's a make-or-break proposition for you, then break. If you can be more flexible and allow a limited focus on the best possible overlap in BOTH of your interests, then you can relax, pipe down, and cultivate just that scope.

    Not everything is black and white. If you have expectations, most people will NOT meet those. If you have curiosity and are willing to support people where THEY are, even if that means that they don't fit their pictures into your frames, then you'll keep your door open to learn what that means.

    If someone mistreats you, then walk away. If someone merely falls short of expectations that they never promised to meet, then question those expectations.

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