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Thread: Maybe messed up with My Crush?

  1. #1

    Maybe messed up with My Crush?

    So i been talking to a girl i met a few weeks ago, things were going pretty good and hit it off, definitely like her alot. Bottom line is we were some what talking about EX's and i feel like i maybe gave a little to much information on what happened with mine (me and my ex were on and off for 4 years, she would leave me get into it with another guy then try and come back, same cycle 2 different times, except this time 6 months ago, i broke it off with her and have no have no intention of ever seeing my ex again but she keeps trying to creep her way back into my life.) So i basically expressed my irritation with that with a vague story behind it. But after reading what i said to my crush, i could see that maybe it came off a little weird. My crush pulled away a little bit. Just curious how maybe i can pull it back around or reassure her that its okay. Shes still talking to me so thats a plus. Im a little rusty in the dating, im also a very open person so things like that can just fly out my mouth.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
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    Leave it alone and try and show positivity in your communications with her. If you try and explain things more you will just remind her and it will not fade away.

    If you project positive vibes about the kind of future you want for your life what you said will seem more like your past and something you learned from.

    Keep it light and fun and ask about her dreams, her plans...anything about her so you take the convo off you and on to her. Be prepared for her to ask the same questions back at you though.

    Lost

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SirTrinculo
    So i been talking to a girl i met a few weeks ago, things were going pretty good and hit it off, definitely like her alot. Bottom line is we were some what talking about EX's and i feel like i maybe gave a little to much information on what happened with mine (me and my ex were on and off for 4 years, she would leave me get into it with another guy then try and come back, same cycle 2 different times, except this time 6 months ago, i broke it off with her and have no have no intention of ever seeing my ex again but she keeps trying to creep her way back into my life.) So i basically expressed my irritation with that with a vague story behind it. But after reading what i said to my crush, i could see that maybe it came off a little weird. My crush pulled away a little bit. Just curious how maybe i can pull it back around or reassure her that its okay. Shes still talking to me so thats a plus. Im a little rusty in the dating, im also a very open person so things like that can just fly out my mouth.
    I agree with Lost on staying positive going forward. You can acknowledge your overshare moment if you feel comfortable talking with this person. The only offputting part that would be a lingering red flag is that you haven't closed the chapter very well with your ex. Both of you don't have a mutual understanding that it's completely over. You'll have to go back and figure out whether you've closed that door firmly and if she's still able to think she has a chance with you, why are you letting her harassing text messages or emails reach you?

    You get to choose how you are affected and how you use your technology and how you want your future relationships to shape up.

    If you can talk about your boundaries more openly with your crush and what boundaries you both have in the getting to know you stage, it may fix this faux pas. Otherwise, move on. This is a huge turn off. You can take it as a lesson learned and stick to those boundaries regarding your exes.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Unfortunately it sounds like you need to talk to friends, family, etc. You don't seem ready to date if the conversations revolve around your ex. Dating is not therapy. If you start out talking about an ex you are not focusing on who you are with and that can turn people off to you.
    Originally Posted by SirTrinculo
    So i been talking to a girl i met a few weeks ag.Bottom line is we were some what talking about EX's and i feel like i maybe gave a little to much information on what happened with mine. Im a little rusty in the dating, im also a very open person so things like that can just fly out my mouth.

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