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Thread: Why don't I feel anything???

  1. #1

    Why don't I feel anything???

    My now ex and I broke up a week ago after 2.5 years of dating (not our first break up btw)-the day he broke up with me I was numb, blinded by anger more than sadness. The day after the break up I was miserable I was crying almost all day-an emotional wreck pretty much.

    The days that followed have been ok-I don't feel sad or depressed I haven't shed a tear since that day, I do think about him all the time though and I've dreamt about my ex everyday since our breakup. Could it be that I'm still in denial about the breakup? Is that why I'm not feeling anything? Or was I over the relationship and he had to pull the plug for me to realize it?? I mean he and I haven't spoken since then, but I still find myself secretly hoping its him when I get a text message.

    Has anyone had this happen to them?

    Thank you!

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. What were the breakups about? What was this breakup about? The same issues? It sounds like you are relieved from all the turmoil.
    Originally Posted by MarissaJ1992
    My now ex and I broke up a week ago after 2.5 years of dating (not our first break up btw)-the day he broke up with me I was numb, blinded by anger more than sadness. I mean he and I haven't spoken since then, but I still find myself secretly hoping its him when I get a text message.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    My guess is you are relieved it's over.

  4. #4
    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Sorry to hear this. What were the breakups about? What was this breakup about? The same issues? It sounds like you are relieved from all the turmoil.
    The only other time we broke up was over something really stupid-we got into a huge fight and he broke things off. We got back together about three months after and the relationship was fine until he broke up with me a week ago saying our relationship had ďran itís courseĒ

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    It could be a few things:

    1.) Delayed reaction (haven't spent enough time apart yet to fully comprehend that it's really over).

    2.) You really were over him and are glad it's done.

    3.)As you said, in denial and don't think it's actually over.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
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    Stages of grief are different for everyone.

    Give yourself time to mourn the loss of what could have been and in time you will see and feel things appropriately for you.

    Be good to yourself and stay in touch with family and friends that love you.

    Lost

  8. #7
    Originally Posted by lostandhurt
    Stages of grief are different for everyone.


    Give yourself time to mourn the loss of what could have been and in time you will see and feel things appropriately for you.

    Be good to yourself and stay in touch with family and friends that love you.

    Lost
    I agree, but the first time he broke up with me I was miserable for about a month. I slowly started to get back on my feet when he popped back into my life. Thatís why Iím so confused.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by MarissaJ1992
    My now ex and I broke up a week ago after 2.5 years of dating (not our first break up btw)-the day he broke up with me I was numb, blinded by anger more than sadness. The day after the break up I was miserable I was crying almost all day-an emotional wreck pretty much.

    The days that followed have been ok-I don't feel sad or depressed I haven't shed a tear since that day, I do think about him all the time though and I've dreamt about my ex everyday since our breakup. Could it be that I'm still in denial about the breakup? Is that why I'm not feeling anything? Or was I over the relationship and he had to pull the plug for me to realize it?? I mean he and I haven't spoken since then, but I still find myself secretly hoping its him when I get a text message.

    Has anyone had this happen to them?

    Thank you!
    Yes, of course.

    Give yourself more time. Is this your first break up? Each one is different. I also want to mention the getting back together and breaking up again pattern makes acceptance of a final break up harder most of the time. It's only logical if your mind has been trained to anticipate a make up again, as if this time isn't final. It also sounds like the break up happened in the heat of the moment or in the midst of an argument and not something you were expecting.

    Remember that when people check out of relationships as solutions to an argument that can be resolved through respectful discussion or conversation, you're witnessing a pattern of behaviour and ongoing difficulties with communication. This shouldn't be the way to resolve arguments or discuss issues.

    Sometimes people do this on purpose to manipulate you into feeling remorse or to trick you into feeling guilt especially if that person needs to gain the upper hand. Stop that cycle of negative emotions and reactions to those emotions and giving into issues that you know are wrong in the relationship or shouldn't be handled a certain way. Never respond to that type of manipulation.

    Take more time and reflect on why the relationship has reached this point. There may be a silver lining.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
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    Marissa.

    I think Melancholy got it right

    Relief, or underlying relief that maybe you haven't noticed just yet.

    Don't overthink the situation. Nothing worse than rumination.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Don't let him 'pop back into your life'. Decide to move d forward, especially with a checked out statement such as 'ran it's course'. Don't be lured back by loneliness, only to set yourself for this again..
    Originally Posted by MarissaJ1992
    I slowly started to get back on my feet when he popped back into my life. Thatís why Iím so confused.

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