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Thread: He says he will never speak to me again

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Let the dust settle. Do not keep contacting him or any of his people. If/when he reaches out, simply end it. It's too many games and stress.
    Originally Posted by Dazz
    You're right. I wish I could take it all back. I see that there's a first time for everything. But would you not at least talk to the girl and officially break up? Would you technically ever contact her back to see if indeed there was an urgency? Would you not pick up a call when you know you had no issues with your girl?

  2. #12
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    He's juggling women and you've been aware of that. You aren't having some mysterious reaction to him not taking your call. That moment triggered the memory of past experiences with him and from what you shared may have really never changed.
    The fact that he could let you go so easily demonstrates he didn't really care enough to begin with.
    Close this door and don't look back.
    Believe you deserve better.

  3. #13
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    He was prob on a date, and texting his friend was gonna blow his cover. You went cray-cray because you knew deep down that the situation you are in stinks, and want to liberate yourself from it. He's not the one. I'd block, and never look back.

  4. #14
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    You are so wise! I have gotten so much strength from your answer. Thank you. Maybe not answering was him exerting control or punishment. Maybe God made me do this mistake as the only way to save myself. I didn't want to go down in history as the crazy girl

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  6. #15
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    True. I guess deep down it didn't feel fully committed. I just felt like I lost my integrity and don't know why I didn't practice more self control. I'm trying to move on. But not having answers suck

  7. #16
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    I thought it was an easy cop out too. Like of all the crazy things that can happen in a relationship, this is the deal breaker when had he picked up this could have been easily resolved? It's just simply wow. Especially since this is a first. No pass whatsover.

  8. #17
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    I don't know how long til the dust settles. I haven't called since he had said he would never call. It's been 4 days. I don't known if he will realize on his end that he overreacted as well.

  9. #18
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    Rather than spinning this around trying to analyze his actions, you're better off accepting the fact that if he wanted to be with you, he would. Of course, I understand this is easier said than done, but respecting yourself can do wonders for your self-esteem.

    Raise your standards...

  10. #19
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Dazz,

    The guy who dumped you reacted in an impulsive and extreme manner. I've encountered personalities similar to your ex-boyfriend which is alarming and those types of people are red flags to me. I don't like people who are so abrupt to the point of cruel. Since your ex-boyfriend had no qualms breaking up with you via text, you're better off without him. Some people's personalities are unreasonable the way they're so Draconian and drastic with their reactions. They're the types who never foresee its harsh consequences.

    I prefer people who are mature, who talk it out, who wish to resolve issues in a calm manner and peaceful types. Hot heads are omitted from my life FOREVER.

    Whenever I've had people block me or react with extremely harsh cruelty towards me, the next time they were nice to me, it was my turn to give them the cold shoulder and I made sure that I exited their life forever. Granted, should our paths cross, I'm polite, respectful yet blunt and frostily distant. Note strong enforced boundaries. I don't give second chances once I find out what people are capable of because I know they'll be mean to me again. It's only a matter of time. I don't trust them anymore. Once bitten, twice shy. Live and learn the hard way.

    As for you, always observe a person's personality and character. If they're the type who easily ghosts or blocks you, cuts you off, breaks up suddenly whether in a relationship or friendship, excludes you from their social events or life, dismisses you easily or discards you if they're moody, you should bail immediately and when I say "bail," I mean you should exit their life permanently. These types of volatile temperaments are unpredictable yet predictable. They're complicated, gaslighting personalities so run for the hills. I've since learned this harsh lesson the hard way. Ever since I've learned how to pick and choose who deserves to be in my life due to following the respect rules, I've never been more content and secure. You ought to try to change the way you think. It's the best thing I had ever done.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Dazz
    I wound up moving since we had stopped talking for a while. I did get erratic. This has never happened before. I'm not sure what came over me. And clearly now I can't make up for it or ask for forgiveness. I'm just so crushed. Has any guy ever come back? I've known women who have done worse and their guy has not dumped them. Why wouldn't he at least have a convo where we ensure something like that never happens again?
    Honey, they all come back.

    But you have to take care of yourself first. It doesn't sound like he was treating you well at all. This person is showing you how little he cares. What you do is you keep walking and you start taking better care of yourself. Be around people who love and care about you.

    You do not have to call or text him anymore. Leave him alone. Be careful if he texts or calls you again or if you run into each other again. You should remember that when someone shows you what they think of you through their actions and words, you look long and hard and you listen exactly to what they're saying. Leave this for a few days, minimum one week, and wait for the withdrawal or panicky feeling to subside. You'll have a clearer head then and then take a good hard look at what's been happening between the both of you.

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