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What should I Do


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So my ex broke up with me 2 months ago saying we need to take a step back and focus on ourselves rather someone else. He told me we will always be friends and he won't abondon me. Well 2 weeks ago he blocked my number. I did send him an email telling him my grandma passed away and asked him what I did for him to block me. So he emailed me back the next day saying he empathize with my loss. it is important to be “immediate” oriented, I realized that. In these times it is necessary. So I emailed him back saying what do you mean by Immediate Oriented. So he replied back saying Hitting the "reset button", while taking the chance at a "true friendship", "in time". What does that even mean? Can someone please let me know.

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He broke up with you. He is trying to avoid you and is throwing nonsense at you. Block him, stop contacting him and try to heal. He is not your friend and is not going to be there for you. That is difficult, but you should redirect your energies toward healing yourself. This relationship is over.

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Very few new partners accept dating people who stay friends with exes. Spend time with the friends you already have and pamper yourself while you mourn a failed relationship so that you can move on. Harder to do when you're pouring energy into someone who doesn't see a future with you.

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He isn't actually interested in staying friends, OP.

 

It's not about abandoning you. It's about recognizing that exes usually don't stay in our lives, and that's the healthiest choice. He can't be your pillar of support any longer. Most dumpers don't genuinely intend to a keep a friendship going, though many will offer it as a way to cushion the blow for the partner they've just left.

 

I'm sorry about your grandmother. Lean on family and close friends.

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Sorry about your loss Rcook, wish i could spend more time with my grandma, she was very sweet, loved dogs, cows, birds, her place was really a heaven to be during summer holidays.

Your ex has your remote control does what he feels like when he feels like cause you have given him the control.

Do you want to be friends with him in future? then block him off from all emails, social media and whats app, when you think you are ready to talk to him as purely friends then communicate.

But you have such strong feelings for him now so think about it seriously, its better to let go find a new partner who loves you and will be there together through thick and thin.

His actions are selfish cause he gets what he wants only looking at his interests, we never know the future its unknown so let him go and focus on yourself and your family.

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Hindsight is nearly always 20/20. If your now ex appears to be speaking in morse code I think it's a good idea you both go your separate ways. There's very little investment there, not even enough to speak in full sentences.

 

He's not interested in keeping in touch. I think this is a fortunate thing for you and will free you up for better things. Keep your chin up.

 

I'm sorry for the loss of your grandma. Don't tell him any more updates about your life especially your grief. That's none of his business even if you are friends at that level. You may be looking for a reaction from someone as a last ditch effort to get something out of him. Keep moving forwards.

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Im going to translate what he said.

 

"Umm, its over, Ive moved on and perhaps you should to"

 

Not to be mean but this is what he is saying. I know confusion sets in when we think back to all the things our Xs said in the past. And in our minds we try to hold them accountable to all the promises they made. Like when our Xs say things like they will be there forever or cant see themselves with anyone else. All past promises about the future has to be tossed out the window because they don't matter anymore. They have to be swept up and placed in the same bin as the relationship. Im sorry but that's how they have to be looked at.

If you can do this, it greatly reduces your confusion level and it will help you move on. And to be honest. Why would you want to be friends with an X anyway? They will find someone and more importantly you will find someone. Is it impossible to be friends with an X? Not at all, but before that can happen, all your desires to be with them must go away. Here is a good test. If they tell you that they found someone that they can marry and you are upset, jealous, angry at that news, then you are not ready to be friends with them. If you can go out and help them find someone they can marry or be happy for them when they do, then you can be friends with them.

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