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Thread: my wife

  1. #1
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    my wife

    My wife is in rehab for alcohol recovery and I really miss her.

  2. #2
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    Just remember that it is for her own good. I am a recovering alcoholic and been sober for nearly two years.
    Just think of the long term rewards of her getting sober.

  3. #3
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    Congrats!
    This is her 2nd stint, she got out the first time and immediately went into quarantine, even after being shut out from attending Meetings in person she made it 120 days before relapse. I was really proud of her for that.

    She has been in for 15 days. Seems to be on a roller coster right now sometimes we have good talks and sometimes it seems like she hates me.

    Any tips to help her in her recovery?

  4. #4
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    She doesn't hate you, she will just be finding the experience challenging and feeling frustrated.
    The best advice I can give to her is to openly discuss any cravings she has and work with a counsellor to address the reasons why she drinks.
    I attend AA and have been in and out a couple of times. Have went back and am now starting the steps.
    How I resist the booze is by thinking what is at stake if I do and finally accepting i can't 'just have one'.
    I think Robin Williams described addiction best when he referred to it as 'the sleeping beast'. It likes to give you a nudge from time to time to get you to wake him up.
    Alcohol was always my stress reliever and i have been tempted lately as some people have pissed me off but i just keep asking myself 'are the b*stards worth it? No they are not. No one or nothing (especially a bottle) is worth dying for.
    I think of it as i am allergic to alcohol and ask if i were allergic to peanuts would i eat one? No certainly not.
    Lastly (you will be relieved lol), remind her that when you get in a relationship with alcohol or other drugs, it is taker not a giver. It will take everything from you but not give you anything.

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  6. #5
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    That is great thinking on your part!

    She uses alcohol to self medicate. I blame myself a lot. I keep going through my head saying if I would have only done this more or I could have done this better.....

    I know it's going to be an ongoing battle for a long time, but I refuse to give up on her.

  7. #6
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    You said she uses alcohol to self medicate?

    Is it perhaps she has an undiagnosed mental illness? Some people with mental health issues instead of getting treatment for it turn to alcohol or drugs. If she got treatment for her mental health and got on the right medication she wouldn’t turn to alcohol.

    Just a thought.

  8. #7
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    That's what I'm hoping they can figure out in her therapy sessions in rehab.

  9. #8
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    I used alcohol to self medicate for past trauma, anxiety and depression. Never worked.
    Trust me, there is nothing u could of done to cause this and u are not at fault.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Help yourself with the appropriate support.
    [Register to see the link]

    Google "Dry drunk". After quitting, many get worse because their real problems are revealed.

    Many get nasty and angry because they miss their "best friend" and resent having that taken away.
    Last edited by Wiseman2; 07-08-2020 at 01:34 AM.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Long term membership in Alcoholics Anonymous has been found to reform pathological narcissism, and those who are sober but retain characteristics associated with addiction are known in AA as dry drunks.

    The term is used by Alcoholics Anonymous in relation to feelings of anger, depression and resentment.

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