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Thread: Looking for a job AND trying for a baby...should I even bother?

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2019
    Hi there,

    I understand why this would be worrying you; it's hard to commit to either direction right now. I think think those who are suggesting alternate employment/contracting/tutoring might be onto something. Does that type of work appeal to you? It may be a good compromise between your options for now. I don't know if you like ESL, but there's also plenty of jobs for online ESL teachers as well.

    Hope you're able to sort this all out, God bless.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Snny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Late to the party.

    We are ready to start a family and the plan is for me to stay at home with the baby once that happens (not forever but longer than the American 12 unpaid weeks).
    Just a BIG WARNING because this happened to me.

    To qualify for the Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA), you MUST be employed for about a year AND have worked at least 1280 hours within the year. I missed the hours requirement and that is how I got massively screwed.

    3 months into a new job, I got pregnant. Unfortunately I had pregnancy complications that put me out of work for a month and a half. Because I was out of work - puking my guts out 8-10x a day due to a condition called HG, and being hospitalized numerous times for it - I did not make 1280 hour requirement therefore DID NOT qualify for FMLA. I was told by my work that I must return as soon as I am medically cleared... but they could not guarantee my job back.

    I ended up returning back to work 4 Fing weeks after my delivery. I had to LIE to my doctor to get cleared to return back to work or I would lose my job. I was NOT ok and suffered Postpartum Depression. I nearly took my own life because of all the BS and stress I was dealing at both home and at work. I am very level headed, but I snapped and had to be evaluated (I am ok now thanks to the supports I received).

    Whatever you do, please wait and eggy establish by working under a company for a year BEFORE getting pregnant. You have no way of knowing OR planning how your pregnancy will turn out once you are pregnant. I had everything planned to the Ts until the medical issues sabotaged my plans (I even had to cancel my BabyMoon trip because I could not stop puking until after I had my baby). Some women have it easier than others, and I won the lottery of having the lousiest. Welcome to America, where they F you over maternity leave. Its ridiculous.
    Last edited by Snny; 08-12-2020 at 01:42 AM.

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