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Thread: I feel like there's something wrong with me and can't help myself

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    I agree with Wiseman. I don't think the level of fighting and conflict that you are experiencing is normal.

    Your personal relationships should strengthen and support you, especially through difficult times. They should not drain you, wear you down, fill you with fear, or force you to struggle.

    I think you need to have a real Come-To-Jesus-Moment about your marriage. I think it's contributing to your currently-poor state of mental health.

    I am glad to hear that you've put off having children, and I hope you resume your medications and therapy.

    Seriously, talk to your therapist about this marriage. I think it's hurting you.

  2. #12
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    I feel like bothering my family doctor again, she said the psychiatrist would call me but gave me no time frame. I'm usually patient but I woke up with my heart racing and difficulty breathing. It's not all my husband's fault, but I do feel like he needs to let things go while I go through this. He said he'll try and he tries to comfort me and say that we'll get through this and that I'm fine, but I really don't feel fine. I can't fall apart at every conflict and be blue all the time and exhaust myself interacting with people. I don't know if it's adjusting to being off my meds... my doctor said I can possibly go on a lower dose of my medication or a different one altogether. I just don't know how hopeful to be, if that's what the issue is or not. I can't even articulate properly what's wrong with me. I keep making my husband sound terrible when usually we're happy and I don't want to lose him. I just want to be happier and fight less/not fall apart when we argue. This quarantine has just been the worst time of my life, by far.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Maybe a pandemic is not the best time to go off of antidepressants?

  4. #14
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Your doctor will not feel "bothered". It's their job to provide care.

    If you don't feel fine you need help.

    I am currently in treatment for anxiety and depression. There is no way I'd be able to get through this without help from medical professionals.

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by catfeeder
    Maybe a pandemic is not the best time to go off of antidepressants?
    I agree, but I started the weaning process back in January in a decent headspace. I didn't know how things would unfold.

    I'm hoping talking to someone could help me, or going back on a lower dose of my medication or something. I just feel desperate at times. I feel like I'm cursed by feeling so low and hopeless, but just sane enough to not do anything reckless. It's like a bottomless pit. And whatever people say about eating well, getting enough sleep, exercise and meditation- none of that is working for me. And I don't know if I'm exaggerating how bad my life is or what I'm doing really. I don't think anyone cares in particular either. My husband cares, but he thinks I can get through this with resiliency.. and I have tried sharing with my parents but my mom has her own mental health issues and I don't want to worry her. So I'm just trying to keep it together and not burst.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by PinkMoonlite
    I agree, but I started the weaning process back in January in a decent headspace. I didn't know how things would unfold.

    I'm hoping talking to someone could help me, or going back on a lower dose of my medication or something. I just feel desperate at times. I feel like I'm cursed by feeling so low and hopeless, but just sane enough to not do anything reckless. It's like a bottomless pit. And whatever people say about eating well, getting enough sleep, exercise and meditation- none of that is working for me. And I don't know if I'm exaggerating how bad my life is or what I'm doing really. I don't think anyone cares in particular either. My husband cares, but he thinks I can get through this with resiliency.. and I have tried sharing with my parents but my mom has her own mental health issues and I don't want to worry her. So I'm just trying to keep it together and not burst.
    Yes, talk with doc about a lower dose, which may really help. I'd also back off on being tough with myself, because NObody is doing fabulously right now. Even those who've never had a mental health issue before are having their fair share of stresses and troubles at this time, so it makes no sense to set a high bar only to clobber yourself for not reaching it.

    I'm not trying to say that good company in misery is helpful, but I am letting you know that a pandemic is hardly the time to measure your mental health.

  8. #17
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Can you keep track of your emotions in a journal? It might be helpful to look back over a period of time and see how you're feeling ups and downs over time and how events affect you. If you are able to see a professional in the future you also have some reference for how your ups and downs are crippling you or limiting you quite a lot in your daily life.

    If you're on medications, definitely keep a journal. I think it'll help you track the effects and how you feel.

    Writing might also introduce some control in an otherwise powerless or helpless situation. This might help in some way too, contributing to the overall ups and downs.

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