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Thread: Are love, being in love, and sexual attraction three different things?

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Acolyte, good to see you still here. I agree it takes time.

    Mocoboco, your wife seems a bit agitated and frustrated. And I think you're hurt. Wait for the marriage counselling to start and see what happens. Take things day by day and don't tear each other apart. If you're hurt and confused, process those emotions and organize them for the counselling sessions. Taking on the errands and anticipating or being more intuitive with the daily chores and taking care of the baby might help also. Instead of needing each other to direct or instruct, just do what needs to be done to relieve any stress. Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    You sound inert emotionally and physically unavailable and admit to shutting her out on many levels. She admits she has lost interest in your lassitude and indifference and has turned to another man emotionally. Unfortunately this is way beyond anything date nights would fix, but it's a place to start.

    You didn't want kids and seem resentful. This has nothing to do with AM vs PM sex drives or being in shape. It has to do with a great deal of unspoken contempt and both of you acting out in a passive aggressive manner. This is why a therapist is your only hope, but to maybe prevent divorce, not rev up your sex life.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
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    Once again, OP said:

    "Actually many times I turned her down in the evenings even before we got married:
    That's why I'm thinking it's hard to come back from this, I've been grinding her down for years and slowly crushed the spark."


    But she married you anyhow, OP.

    I hope it works out for you both.

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