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Thread: Me and her are living in a completely different world and it`s tearing me apart

  1. #21
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Surrey BC, Canada
    Anyways you obviously don't know or understand women. You are only thinking with a man's brain...well guess what...your perceptive cannot be applied to what is going on with her. Sex isn't just a physical NEED, it's an emotional need for women. Our sexual desires are emotionally motivated, and guided by our emotinal intellect. I think what would help is to start reading some romance novels like one's written by Jane Austin, and some Harlequin trash novels to see what really turns women on. We need to be romanced, the slow burn of sexual tension, the need to feel desired outside the bedroom.

    Just throwing off the covers and showing an erection doesn't and won't cut it. Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #22
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    All gender stereotypes aside, most people appreciate a deeper connection and less pressure when it comes to intimacy and bonding.

    When conversations are framed and thoughts are set in adversarial approaches, frustrations and issues usually become worse. Suspicions, low self-esteem from not enough intimacy, sadness, frustration and helplessness create a vicious cycle of abuse and neglect in a relationship.

    Both of you are suffering. If you haven't already, have you tried couple's therapy? There's a missing link or a few missing links in your love story. Issues as slight as a betrayal of trust or omissions of truth, negative associations friends, coworkers, etc, can tip the balance in a couple's sex life. Repetitive routines and not enough time spent apart to recharge also contribute to issues with sex or compatibility/libido.

    You both may also have a lot of time to pursue your own interests but do both of you feel free to do so? There's a difference between conceived ideas of freedom and living that freedom. I think your relationship has come down to so much contempt and frustration that the prospects of feeling free, spontaneous and alive are cut short prematurely.

    It's very hard to keep frustrations to a minimum in a long term relationship or marriage. Kindness and communication are the only things that work, in my opinion. Once those two are nowhere to be seen, it makes it very hard for a couple to give each other the benefit of the doubt.

    When you trust and believe that your partner is doing their best, this is an extension of an olive branch and it's trust and faith that your partner is living with you and loving you in their way. Intimacy has a chance to grow or deepen. I think both of you would benefit a lot from counselling. Intimacy starts in the heart and the mind. The body only follows.

  3. #23
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2015
    Originally Posted by smackie9
    Just throwing off the covers and showing an erection doesn't and won't cut it.
    Amateurs my dear....they just don't know...

    It's all about undressing slowly and torturously. And leaving the good stuff to the imagination 😎😈

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