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Thread: My marriage turned into a lifetime movie!

  1. #11
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
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    Welcome to ENA,

    First off I have been through what you are going through.

    She put the blame on me for her cheating and lies. I fell for it for a while until my best friend threatened to beat me with a bat if I didn't wake up and see what she was doing. In time I found this place and got a ton of support and very frank and honest advice that I didn't want to hear but I needed to hear.

    Eventually I learned to accept that the woman I had been with for 20 years was simply an unhappy person that lied, cheated and betrayed our family and future. She could not be trusted, she wasn't going to snap out of it and be the woman I married and she had no real remorse for the pain she had caused. She was sorry she got caught but other than that she was cold as ice.

    Cheaters are selfish and only really care about their own WANTS at that moment and they will lie to you and themselves to get what they WANT. She blames you because she cannot admit to herself what a horrible person she is and has been the whole marriage.

    Straight up she has shown you who she really is, can you accept that the woman you love is a lying, cheating and selfish person you can never trust? Acceptance is key in all this.

    I was like you thinking how a divorce would ruin me financially but what is the cost of happiness? It sounds like you can easily be happy living a modest life with your children. The sooner you get this over with the sooner you can begin to rebuild your life without all the stress, lies and betrayal. Trust me I know what it is like to live with what you are living and I know how it feels when you finally shed that burden and can focus solely on your life and your children's lives. It is an awesome feeling.

    All you are to her is security and home base for her fantasies. You are the window dressing she can use to make her life look respectable while she cheats and lies. You need to stop being a doormat because you love her and protect yourself and your future. She is using your love for her against you and she is good at it. Break the cycle, stop listening to the lies and do what you know deep down is the right thing to do.

    Divorce sucks but living this hell is so much worse. I consider my wife's cheating to be a blessing now. She showed her true colors so I didn't waste any more time on someone that only cared about what she wanted no matter who it hurt.

    I am happier now that I ever was married to her and you will be too.

    There is a lot to do so are you ready to get started?

    Lost

  2. #12
    Platinum Member
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    A cheater like your wife will never change. She is doing what she wants to do in life and she has found someone, you, that let's her do it--screw other men.

    Get your self respect back!

    It's hogwash that you cannot be ok as a man, a family, after a divorce.

    I've done it. Yes, it is a process into the unknown. But it is more than survivable. You can flourish, as can your kids.

    Who cares if she does.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    Briefly adding one suggestion. Keep the family home. Rent a cheap room where you can live one week, and then your soon-to-be ex can live the next week, rotating. That way the kids can stay in the family home. Depends, of course, on how you run the home-based business. Read about other families doing this so just shooting it out there in case it would work for you.

  4. #14
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    Multiple accounts are not allowed...Closed.

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