Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 4 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast
Results 31 to 40 of 44

Thread: Ladies, your advice please.

  1. #31
    Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    122
    Originally Posted by DancingFool
    You sound almost addicted to the attention and suffering from withdrawal.....

    Is it really so hard for you to understand that spending that much time talking to a person can become exhausting and that at some point communication has to normalize...because people really do have other things to do besides spending all day yapping on the phone? I mean if that's all you've got going for you, you really should revisit your life choices. You will smother most relationships with that level of neediness. No woman can be your constant daily entertainer all day every day nonstop without a pause and no woman can shoulder the responsibility for being the center of your universe. That's one heck of a burden to place on a person.

    Calm down, back off. Find something else to do. Never engage in that much intense chatting daily. Yes her backing off is a yellow flag...possibly a stop flag. Give her some space and even if she returns, be calmer, keep things more reasonable, don't keep her on the phone for hours. It.does.get.old.

    I am aware of that. I'm not the attention-craving type. Both of us engage in minimal texting through the day and have a long phone call night. Neither is needy. It's a balanced reciprocation. And my concern isn't having a break or space, if anything it's good and healthy. My concern is her sudden change of behavior. That's all. Anyhow, till will tell. Thanks for your feedback though



    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    This is another important point, OP. Whether or not this woman has lost interest, that sort of communication every day isn't sustainable. You have to realize that sooner or later, it peters out as people resume their usual habits and responsibilities.

    Try to pace it more in the beginning so you don't have unrealistic expectations of it continuing when daily life gets in the way.
    I totally agree with you 100%. Too much neediness from either side isn't healthy. And believe me I pace myself pretty well, I've learnt so. Besides, her overnight sleepover was a good 2-day break as we minimally texted. Now going on to the 4th day. It's not the "have a break" that is concerning me, that's the least of my worries, it's her evident sudden change of behavior that is concerning me.

    Originally Posted by poorlittlefish
    I don't understand this. You're both home with no jobs/school etc because of quarantine, yet she can go to an overnighter with multiple friends but you won't have another date for 3 weeks or more? That sounds very contradictory. Why such a delay when you don't have anything much else on?

    Also, you said she hadn't replied because she'd "passed out" - do you mean because she'd drunk herself into oblivion or because she was just asleep? If it's the former, then, given your anxiety about her change in behaviour or level of contact, maybe she's not someone who's going to be a good fit for you.
    She lives a 2-hour flight away from me in a different city/country with different rules. Her airport will open in a few weeks, then I can go back home.

  2. #32
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    40,629
    Gender
    Male
    She probably had to wait to go to her bf's bathroom to text you. Sorry the slumber party story sounds like bull. You've never met, you're not exclusive so why won't she be at a guy's house overnight?
    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    her overnight sleepover was a good 2-day break as we minimally texted.

  3. #33
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    10,928
    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    I totally agree with you 100%. Too much neediness from either side isn't healthy. And believe me I pace myself pretty well, I've learnt so. Besides, her overnight sleepover was a good 2-day break as we minimally texted. Now going on to the 4th day. It's not the "have a break" that is concerning me, that's the least of my worries, it's her evident sudden change of behavior that is concerning me..
    I gather she hasn't been in touch yet, then?

  4. #34
    Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    122
    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    I gather she hasn't been in touch yet, then?
    She has yesterday, we spoke on the phone. She was on her period (which I thought she might be) so she had cramps in her stomach, plus she was sun-burnt from staying at her friend's when they were at the pool, so she spent all day in bed when she got home relaxing and healing, and just wanted some time.

  5.  

  6. #35
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    25,088
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    Yes video chatted. And sure single and sure 29.



    Perhaps. But one person changing their actions overnight, when the past 3 weeks have been daily interactions, does raise a yellow flag.
    As a relationship, acquaintanceship, etc, progresses - there will be days when the other person has a tough day and just wants to sleep, sees a relative, etc, and they won't be available 24/7. if she is going back to work after stay at home orders are up, she won't be at your beck and call. You expect her life to revolve on some guy she chats with online. It is not.

  7. #36
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    25,088
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    She has yesterday, we spoke on the phone. She was on her period (which I thought she might be) so she had cramps in her stomach, plus she was sun-burnt from staying at her friend's when they were at the pool, so she spent all day in bed when she got home relaxing and healing, and just wanted some time.
    All of that for nothing. And TMI if she is talking about her period to you if you only have been chatting 3 weeks

  8. #37
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    10,928
    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    She has yesterday, we spoke on the phone. She was on her period (which I thought she might be) so she had cramps in her stomach, plus she was sun-burnt from staying at her friend's when they were at the pool, so she spent all day in bed when she got home relaxing and healing, and just wanted some time.
    And do you feel more relaxed now?

  9. #38
    Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    122
    Originally Posted by abitbroken
    All of that for nothing. And TMI if she is talking about her period to you if you only have been chatting 3 weeks
    hmm perhaps TMI. I guess she just felt comfortable.


    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    And do you feel more relaxed now?
    Yes, definitely relieved. If she mentioned that initially, i would've been totally fine. Let her have as much time as she likes. It's just the sudden disconnect that got to me, that's all.

  10. #39
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    52,393
    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    hmm perhaps TMI. I guess she just felt comfortable.




    Yes, definitely relieved. If she mentioned that initially, i would've been totally fine. Let her have as much time as she likes. It's just the sudden disconnect that got to me, that's all.
    So if I were really into someone and had personal reasons for needing to disconnect I would let the person know that to make sure there was no misunderstanding because I wouldn't want to alienate the person.

  11. #40
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    10,928
    Originally Posted by Batya33
    So if I were really into someone and had personal reasons for needing to disconnect I would let the person know that to make sure there was no misunderstanding because I wouldn't want to alienate the person.
    I was thinking the same thing.

Page 4 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast

Videos


Maintaining A Strong Relationship

Detaching From a Malignant Man

Divorced Parents Prefer Technology and Social Media As Communication Tool

Wedding Jitters Could Be a Predictor for a Future Divorce

Botox Fights Depression And Makes You Feel Happier

Men Are More Sensitive than Women when Having Relationship Problems
Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •