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Thread: Ladies, your advice please.

  1. #21
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    Wasnít watching her IG specifically, just noticed her watching my story.

    Something is just not right, its evident. Time will tell what it is.
    Anyhow, thanks for your feedback. Iíll suck it in for the night, and see whatís up tomorrow.
    Good call. If she's disinterested too and hot/cold, probably not the greatest person to have around. You deserve better.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Flash in the pan as I say. You and possibly others she's chatting with. Should never invest so heavily in someone you have never met. When they do a 180 usually means there is someone else. I would question the story of 7 girls having a "sleep over" during a pandemic.

  3. #23
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Slumber parties and then "busy"? Have you video-chatted? Are you sure she is 29 or single?
    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    girl-friend. It was a bunch of girls. Like 7 of them. I'm 33, she's 29. long distance, 2-hour flight.

  4. #24
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    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    Because it's highly unlikely. We're under quarantine with 7pm curfews so there is only so much that can be done. Plus noticed activity on her Instagram. I know these may not be enough reason to believe so, but it's also a gut feeling.
    You are kidding me that there is only so much you can do with a 7 pm curfew. I can think of a million ways to be busy.

    You can be on Instagram and mindlessly scroll and like when you are on the toilet or when you cannot sleep at 3 am. Its not a time where you would call someone. If she is with her girlfriends, she should be focusing on them. If she is with her family for the first time since COVID, etc, she is spending time with them.

    Honestly, the next thing is going to be that you act possessive and this will blow up, Be glad someone has a life outside of some guy on the phone

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  6. #25
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Slumber parties and then "busy"? Have you video-chatted? Are you sure she is 29 or single?
    My roommate used to have "the girls" over for old time's sake when some from out of town came. Their slumber party was running the margarita machine to whatever time at night. It wasn't pillowfights. It was staying all night chatting, hanging out and spending the night.

  7. #26
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Slumber parties and then "busy"? Have you video-chatted? Are you sure she is 29 or single?
    Yes video chatted. And sure single and sure 29.

    Originally Posted by abitbroken
    You are kidding me that there is only so much you can do with a 7 pm curfew. I can think of a million ways to be busy.

    You can be on Instagram and mindlessly scroll and like when you are on the toilet or when you cannot sleep at 3 am. Its not a time where you would call someone. If she is with her girlfriends, she should be focusing on them. If she is with her family for the first time since COVID, etc, she is spending time with them.

    Honestly, the next thing is going to be that you act possessive and this will blow up, Be glad someone has a life outside of some guy on the phone
    Perhaps. But one person changing their actions overnight, when the past 3 weeks have been daily interactions, does raise a yellow flag.

  8. #27
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    You sound almost addicted to the attention and suffering from withdrawal.....

    Is it really so hard for you to understand that spending that much time talking to a person can become exhausting and that at some point communication has to normalize...because people really do have other things to do besides spending all day yapping on the phone? I mean if that's all you've got going for you, you really should revisit your life choices. You will smother most relationships with that level of neediness. No woman can be your constant daily entertainer all day every day nonstop without a pause and no woman can shoulder the responsibility for being the center of your universe. That's one heck of a burden to place on a person.

    Calm down, back off. Find something else to do. Never engage in that much intense chatting daily. Yes her backing off is a yellow flag...possibly a stop flag. Give her some space and even if she returns, be calmer, keep things more reasonable, don't keep her on the phone for hours. It.does.get.old.

  9. #28
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    On some days, she has more time than others. On one day, she can talk to you for hours and other times, she prefers to do something else. Respect other people's time and space. It's not healthy to spend that much time on the phone anyway for you, too. Eventually too much familiarity breeds contempt.

    If you want to keep your relationship fresh, don't over do it with excessive phone communication. Give each other a break!

  10. #29
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    Originally Posted by DancingFool
    Is it really so hard for you to understand that spending that much time talking to a person can become exhausting and that at some point communication has to normalize...because people really do have other things to do besides spending all day yapping on the phone?
    This is another important point, OP. Whether or not this woman has lost interest, that sort of communication every day isn't sustainable. You have to realize that sooner or later, it peters out as people resume their usual habits and responsibilities.

    Try to pace it more in the beginning so you don't have unrealistic expectations of it continuing when daily life gets in the way.

  11. #30
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    Originally Posted by lmasterz
    We do have hours and hours given the current circumstances. Realistically a date to actually happen will probably be in another 3 weeks or so.
    I don't understand this. You're both home with no jobs/school etc because of quarantine, yet she can go to an overnighter with multiple friends but you won't have another date for 3 weeks or more? That sounds very contradictory. Why such a delay when you don't have anything much else on?

    Also, you said she hadn't replied because she'd "passed out" - do you mean because she'd drunk herself into oblivion or because she was just asleep? If it's the former, then, given your anxiety about her change in behaviour or level of contact, maybe she's not someone who's going to be a good fit for you.

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