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Thread: Is my behavior inappropriate?

  1. #21
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    Originally Posted by TMurphy
    So you think I may have developed feelings for this girl even though I just view her as a friend?

    And actually I don't really talk to anyone else very often, my parents maybe. I do not have many friends, I dont usually socialize a lot. Usually just work and with my wife.
    Yes I do. "We started out talking on the phone about work but now we talk on the phone almost everyday for 30 minutes to an hours and not too much about work anymore, just conversation." Do you see a pattern building here? First, it's work related. then it's not work related, then your conversations become longer, etc. Get the picture? This is wrong on so many levels...

  2. #22
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Show her this post: This is not a court, she is not on trial and a forum is not a jury.

    Yes if you have to troll, lie and then show that to your wife marriage therapy is definitely in order.
    Originally Posted by TMurphy
    So I have to come clean, the scenario I told in my original post was actually about my wife. I made it about me so that people did feel biased to just say she was wrong.

  3. #23
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Doesn't matter what your feelings are, what you are doing is inappropriate and disrespectful to your wife.

    You are acting like you are in the beginnings of dating. AND if it makes your wife feel bad, cut it out man, or you are going to lose your wife.

    And if it's the other way around, yes your wife is being disrespectful of you. it don't matter if it's a wife or husband...it's not right.

    BUT I do know a married couple that are OK with these types of "relationships", but that is something they are both ok with.

  4. #24
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by smackie9
    Doesn't matter what your feelings are, what you are doing is inappropriate and disrespectful to your wife.

    You are acting like you are in the beginnings of dating. AND if it makes your wife feel bad, cut it out man, or you are going to lose your wife.

    And if it's the other way around, yes your wife is being disrespectful of you. it don't matter if it's a wife or husband...it's not right.

    BUT I do know a married couple that are OK with these types of "relationships", but that is something they are both ok with.
    His update says his wife is actually the one spending time with another man. He posted this and showed his wife to prove a point, I guess.

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  6. #25
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Yes, your behavior is highly inappropriate! You need to enforce healthy boundaries with people including coworkers. Your sincere loyalty and devotion belongs to your wife. Guard your eyes, heart and mind because your wife will appreciate it.

    I'm married and my husband and I know how to respect each other accordingly as should you.

    Cut that chat with your coworker. (Same with all electronic communication, too.) Remain professional, well mannered, polite, respectful, kind yet distant. Know where to draw the line. No more after hour drinks. Go home to your wife. You're not a single guy anymore. Act like a respectable married man.

    Going out for an occasional lunch with a group of coworkers is okay. That's it. Be honorable and show your marriage respect.

    It doesn't matter regarding gender whether the husband or wife spending excessive time with the opposite gender. Integrity is required even when no one is looking. That's what love and respect is.
    Last edited by Cherylyn; 05-29-2020 at 04:30 PM.

  7. #26
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Cherylyn
    Yes, your behavior is highly inappropriate! You need to enforce healthy boundaries with people including coworkers. Your sincere loyalty and devotion belongs to your wife. Guard your eyes, heart and mind because your wife will appreciate it.

    I'm married and my husband and I know how to respect each other accordingly as should you.

    Cut that chat with your coworker. (Same with all electronic communication, too.) Remain professional, well mannered, polite, respectful, kind yet distant. Know where to draw the line. No more after hour drinks. Go home to your wife. You're not a single guy anymore. Act like a respectable married man.

    Going out for an occasional lunch with a group of coworkers is okay. That's it. Be honorable and show your marriage respect.

    It doesn't matter regarding gender whether the husband or wife spending excessive time with the opposite gender. Integrity is required even when no one is looking. That's what love and respect is.
    He said it's actually his wife who is going out with a coworker. His most recent post gives this detail. He then apparently showed his wife this thread.

    Interesting way to communicate IMO.

  8. #27
    Gold Member Skeptic76's Avatar
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    Haha, manipulators gon manipulate.

  9. #28
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    His update says his wife is actually the one spending time with another man. He posted this and showed his wife to prove a point, I guess.
    I know that's why I mentioned it being the other way around is just as equally inappropriate...I wasn't going to retype my whole reply....it's a faceless person behind a keyboard so who really knows if this is true or not...if it's him doing it or the wife...just fishing for someone to have a double standard? I really don't see the point of doing this thread. A bunch of strangers on the net isn't going to prove anything to her if she doesn't find fault in what she is doing. How she feels about is how she feels about it.

  10. #29
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by smackie9
    I know that's why I mentioned it being the other way around is just as equally inappropriate...I wasn't going to retype my whole reply....it's a faceless person behind a keyboard so who really knows if this is true or not...if it's him doing it or the wife...just fishing for someone to have a double standard? I really don't see the point of doing this thread. A bunch of strangers on the net isn't going to prove anything to her if she doesn't find fault in what she is doing. How she feels about is how she feels about it.
    My thoughts exactly... one shouldn't need a bunch of strangers to prove their own point to their spouse.

    Is the sky blue? Is 5 hour lunch with opposite sex shaky as heck? duh

  11. #30
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Totally agree.

    I don't think involving Internet strangers to get opinions is a healthy communication method between spouses.

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