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My boyfriend can’t keep a job


senick

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My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and I have worked the whole time at the same job and just got a promotion as well. He keeps insisting he’s going to get a job and does sometimes but it never lasts more than a few weeks until he quits or gets fired. He doesn’t want to work a job like at a Walmart or McDonald’s, only will take a high paying job. He then says to me that we should move in together and I should move to where he lives(an hour away from me, my job and family to which I am very very close) because when he gets a job it will pay more than mine, therefore he thinks he has the right to make that choice for me. I told him my job I cannot transfer to another location at my new position as assistant manager. They have one at his store where I’d transfer already. He says I should just work up from the bottom again and take a demotion, pay cut and go back to part time just to move up there. I see this is very unfair since he has never been willing to consider the option of him looking for work near me and relocating, but he assumes that I should just drop everything for him. This has caused numerous fights between us and I’m feeling at my wits end. Please help, I need an unbiased opinion on this situation I am dealing with.

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what drama, he is acting like a super controlling jerk, i did say to your bf get a job get a life good bye & good riddance, funally go have a beer with your friends, you are better off without him

Sorry being blunt here , Get a new boyfriend period.

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In my honest opinion he has absolutely no jurisdiction in making your decisions. Work wise, life wise or other wise. I don't know your entire situation but it seems to me that he's in a bit of a rut and will be pulling you down with him. You know what you're doing, nothing to fight about. If he's not willing to make adjustments to get his life in order you should maybe consider reevaluating his endearing concern for you.

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He sounds like a jerk who doesnt actually want to have a job. If you move to his town you'd be a fool and then you move in with him and have to pay all of the rent because he doesnt or cant get a job! Dont fall for that crap! You sound like you have a decent job and are in a situation with work that works for you, so dont give it up for him. Instead, give him up and find someone who isnt so lazy.

 

These people who only want a high paying job are laughable.

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Stay independent and never depend on anyone to pay your bills.

 

My advice to you is to stay where you are, do not put your career in jeopardy and remain financially independent. This person has all kinds of red flags. I'd urge you to seriously rethink this relationship. I've seen a lot of talented and smart individuals get sidetracked in life. Stay focused and make decisions in your best interest.

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girlfriend, what are you doing even entertaining this guy?

 

Best indicator of future behavior is past performance.

 

In the future his job will pay more? Ok what job?

 

The world is full of people unable or unwilling to do the hard work it takes to be successful. They are full of excuses, delusions and storylines of how when (fill in the blank) happens, they will show you!

 

BS! What has he done to set any kind of foundation or plan to acheive this job?

 

Its super easy for someone else to say, leave all you have, take a demotion and move here. Only do that if you want to stunt your own career and become his care taker...

 

Why are you even considering this? And why do you date a do nothing pipe dreamer?

 

You can do better. wake up. This guy is wasting his life and yours.

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What, exactly, does this guy bring to your life that makes settling for him worth it?

 

You can walk away at any time and raise your bar on finding someone who deserves you.

 

Are you actually considering trashing everything that's important to you for a guy who models his own lousy advice? If so, WHY?

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Unbiased opinion is that your boyfriend is a delusional loser who will ruin your life if you keep dating him. You won't pull him up to your level, he'll drag you down to his - broke, unemployed, no career, let's keep moving chasing delusions of grandeur as he keeps losing jobs and this place is no good and that place is no good and so on. This is never going to stop.

 

OP step off the crazy train and never ever give up your stable job and career for any man. Always have your own life, your own money and never ever put yourself in a position where you have to depend on a man for that. Especially when this guy has proven to you over the entire time you've known him that he is nothing but full of hot air and bs. In reality he can't hold down any job whatsoever, let alone talk nonsense like you should move because he and his imaginary job is grander....lol.... I don't know how you can even keep a straight face when he talks like that.

 

My really honest opinion - dump him. He isn't a great guy, he is a loser. Probably a fun and charming one, someone who can talk the talk, but...you can't build a life on that. Stop wasting your time and life on hot air and bs.

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He can ask for anything he wants but ultimately you get to make the decision on what's best for you. You describe him as insisting you make these sacrifices. What exactly does he have to stand on? And why do you feel the need to defend your position to him?

You are an adult, he's not your parent and based on his employment pattern, he has zero credibility.

Not sure why there is what seems like a power struggle over this. What he is asking from you is ridiculous. He'd feel better if he drug you down to his level? I would tell him it's non negotiable and not open for discussion.

If at some future time he has some solid long term work longevity and some opportunity for advancement, then the two of you can talk about the future. But for now the subject is off the table.

Personally, I'd end the relationship. He's shown you his work ethic, or lack there of.

I don't think you'd want a lifetime of that.

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Boyfriend is a loser and a jerk. You can look forward to supporting this guy if you move in with him. I cannot understand why you are with him.

 

I am curious as to what type of high paying jobs he can get?

 

What do your friends and family think of him?

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Does he have a problem with drugs? He seems delusional.

He keeps insisting he’s going to get a job and does sometimes but it never lasts more than a few weeks until he quits or gets fired.

 

He doesn’t want to work a job like at a Walmart or McDonald’s, only will take a high paying job.

 

He says I should just work up from the bottom again and take a demotion, pay cut and go back to part time just to move up there.

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