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Thread: Playing gooseberry to my boyfriend and my female best friend

  1. #11
    @Rose Mosse It was not like this before lockdown. I am hoping it is a phase. With neither of them having much else to do. I wouldn't say we have nothing in common usually. I think not being to go anywhere and the lack of daily routine to break up the days probably doesn't help. I am hoping that is all it is. I feel like maybe we should be exploring some interests and hobbies we can do from home perhaps. I don't really game with him - but then that's not because I don't like to. Neither of us have ever really asked the other to game I guess - I tend to leave him to it because I appreciate he might like a bit of down time alone, or with his friends. But now it feels more like alone time for him and one of my friends 🤷

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Cloud Nine
    Go back to your own place. He sounds incredibly boring to be around.

  3. #13
    Bronze Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2019
    I would talk to each of them individually and ask them what they think about the situation. Lay down your boundaries and if they can't respect them, maybe this is not the right friend or boyfriend for you.

    Originally Posted by Daydreamer07
    he has her on SnapChat but not me and refuses the idea.

    I know if i hadn't he wouldn't even give me 20 mins a day on the phone let alone hour and half
    Why is that though? He sounds incredibly stingy with his time and affection as a boyfriend. Is this relationship satisfactory to you? You should not have to stay with him in order to force him to spend time together IMO.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Your boyfriend doesn't sound very classy. I'm so sorry. I think you can do better and if he starts spending more time with her and breaks your heart in the process, I think it's better off that way. He's getting close to bottom of the barrel by the way he treats you or takes you forgranted.

    Move back home and get out of his apartment. If you feel you are there just to watch and see what he does with your best friend, you're not there for the right reasons. Both of you should be with each other because you enjoy your time together, not because you fear alternative outcomes. Or because you want to spy on how far he gets with your best friend.

    When someone shows you the door, walk right through.

    Maybe it is age or tolerance levels in general. I wouldn't bother talking about it as this is not a new relationship. There's nothing that he "needs" to know about you as he should know you by now. If he doesn't, that's on him. As you do not live together, I would not hesitate mentioning casually that it appears he's busy quite a lot of the time and you have a few things you need to do. Get back to your place and begin to make your home yours. Don't ever depend on your partner for those comforts and don't overstay your welcome. You shouldn't have to explain yourself. Cheerfully be on your way. There are places to see and things to do.


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