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Thread: A peaceful vent

  1. #11
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    I don't chase people anymore if they want to spend time with me they will do so, am content with living alone and my company :)...celebrating being single and doing my own thing.

  2. #12
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    ok the whole isolation due to the pandemic does take a lot out of you. I see people now moving around without masks, i ventured out to get Gas with a mask & a hoodie on, just to drive a around a bit, surprisingly its a normal life for many.

    Few people i thought don't realize there is no vaccine around for corona virus and are roaming around as if there is no pandemic.

    Layoffs are happening quietly in companies. i wish companies around the world would cut their top executive salaries by 10 to 20% and save this jobs . I hope all find courage through these tough times.
    Too many businesses down, people losing jobs, people worried about paying their rents, taxes, loans etc. People living in abuse with their spouses, breakups, its really a big mess that this coronavirus has brought about.

    The world is not going to be the same once we get through this.

    Today i skipped my meditation and journaling, i will do my work out in the evening, talk to Mom who is staying at our ancestral home. i love to hear her voice her smile and the way she jokes about life in general. i miss her to be honest.

    unfortunately she doesn't like smartphones so cant do video calls, never see the pictures i send her :(

  3. #13
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    Sometimes in life you find yourself in the same situation again and again until you learn the lesson.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    I used to temp for a company that needed to cut costs. So they let a lot of upper management go, including my boss who was the Controller. I'm sure it was awful for him, going from a six figure salary to nothing but they were able to keep more jobs by letting him and other executives go.

    But the upper level executives don't want to lose their jobs. So it results in the lowest paid people losing their jobs, who are ill-equipped to go without a paycheck. I'm extremely fortunate to have 3 months expenses saved up but too many people are not able to do that.

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  6. #15
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    so true, the lowest paid become the easy targets , how having a good savings plan really helps, am avoiding on many unwanted purchases these days.
    With many governments officially declaring recession things have really become tough.
    Few of my friends have lost jobs but they are managing by renting out their second homes.
    Others are posting over LinkedIn taking up any online job coming their way these days

  7. #16
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    today was one of those bad days for me kept remembering her bad behaviour the panic attacks the lies and everything just felt so unreal about the relationship. cursed me sometimes to get involved with someone that was far from the person she was initially. Am way too gullible in terms of understanding a persons character, do people one day get up and hurt you with words actions just like that, no i guess they already have lot of anger and hate for you before they start acting like that. Nobody who says that they love you can hurt you and cause damage to your well being.
    She is broken and damaged and i don't know why i got attached to her, this whole white night syndrome, thinking of you are going to save somebody somehow, becomes a part your system while growing up. Sometimes i feel bad relationships teach you a lot but you change something breaks inside you and that part of you never comes back its gone, you come to the realisation that the world around you is not what you thought it is, there are bad people and there are good people, there are more bad people than good people.

    Unfortunately all these people are around you, they lead a healthy life as they show to the society but deep down they are these pathetic souls who are broken and need urgent help/therapy.

    Why do these people show all the goodie goodie stuff initially and one fine day leave you in a mess.

  8. #17
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    been a week without my usual work out schedule, mediation was off track, finally after few bad days worked out, have a schedule with a customer project tonight. So hopefully the whole release in production will go through without hassles.

    One thing i observed the moment am doing some work be it the project documentation, presentations or just studies, focus automatically comes in , all those negative feelings don't come and byte me.

    Just watching Mentalist on prime, completed Bosch all 6 seasons, awesome crime investigative series, i love those crime mysteries, the way they say it - its what not in the details that you need to look out for. Ain't it right in real life too, its what in the person that you don't know that could turn out to be so bad and damaging for your health, lol. Life is so beautiful without all the drama around.

  9. #18
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    Believe in your greatness & never fear your growth. Love yourself through your mistakes & your misguided actions. There will be many whispers along the way that are grounded in hate & filled with jealousy. Keep going, keep moving. God is not finished with you yet -- Brian

  10. #19
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    Been putting in lot of hours at work , studies and taking few more professional courses & exams.
    Life sometimes gives you hope when we cant see any, there is strength in weakness too. Key is to find that tiny bit of strength and work through those hard times in your life. Never lose yourself through bad circumstances in life. Hang in there and keep doing something positive for your self, be grateful for what you have learned and achieved in life. Knowledge, experience are so powerful that nobody can take that away from you, It will always support you through your darkest times. Believe and keep moving ahead.

  11. #20
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    Slightly proud of myself to not let the bad phase of this life overcome me with sadness and sorrow.

    Sharing this small moment of happiness while going through it. I hope i keep going and look back to these days as a tremendous lesson learnt something i shall never regret at all.

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    Last edited by Spawn; 06-19-2020 at 02:57 AM.

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