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Thread: Should I break up or trying to rebuild my relationship?

  1. #1

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    Should I break up or trying to rebuild my relationship?

    Hi,

    Long story in short. From a few months my boyfriend was acting strange. I was telling him that i feel something is wrong, he was trying to calm me down saying 'everything is okay'. 1 month ago I've found out that he had a tinder and spoke to different girls.. i was completely broken.. I didn't know if I should give him a chance.. after that we spoke i decided to give him another chance but... he told me, he is not sure if he wants to be in the relationship at the moment (we are together from October 2018), he said he can't commit to me etc. I wasn't sure what to do but we decided to work this out together.. everything was OK, just a few situation when i was jealous.. i'm trying not to be but sometimes is difficult.. but now I feel like he doesn't want this anymore, that he doesn't care anymore. He said me that he is with me now because he loves me and he know if he finally will be able to commit I will be the best girlfriend for him.. so now he is loyal but i don't feel like he cares about me.. i don't know what to do. shall I break up? but when i think about break up I'm completely broken ..

  2. #2
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    I would have ended it the moment I found out he was shopping for your replacement on Tinder.

    This guy is not relationship material for you. He's already checked out.

  3. #3
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    He checked out months ago.

    He said he canít commit to you.
    That was him being truthful!!!!

    He said if he ever feels like committing , that you would be someone he would consider!?
    That was his lies!!!!

    Your choice , but I know what I would do.

    Is it good enough for you to hang around while he tests the waters elsewhere?
    And act loyal temporarily to see IF he can commit to you?

    He is a coward and selfish.

    Why are you attracted to him???

  4. #4
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    This is over. He has cheated on you-we definitely know emotionally, probably physically-and says he is not certain he wants to be with you. Either one of these issues should have been the end.

    Drop this cheat., you are only hurting yourself! He does not love you, as his actions clearly show.

    You have been together for 1.5 years, and he still does not know. C'mon. This guy is stringing you along

  5.  

  6. #5

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    He explained himself as he didn't want to cheat on me, he just wanted to check if he is still attractive. That was the most stupid explanation i've ever heard but i still have forgiven him.. i though he is worth this and he promised to change but i still feel like he just prefer to speak and spend time with his mates.. he needs 'day off' from me etc. I don't know if he is worth my time, if i should believe his words that he needs a time to find himself. i don't want to be used..

  7. #6
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Someone you can't trust isn't going to make you feel secure and loved no matter what he does or says.

    You get to decide whether this is enough for you, and whether walking on eggshells and policing him until you find the next act of disloyalty is how you want to live.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. You have good instincts. Don't date cheaters or people who don't want a relationship. End it. There is no reason to date wishy-washy snakes.
    Originally Posted by kasiaaa
    I was telling him that i feel something is wrong
    1 month ago I've found out that he had a tinder and spoke to different girls.

    he told me, he is not sure if he wants to be in the relationship at the moment
    I feel like he doesn't want this anymore, that he doesn't care anymore.

  9. #8

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    Originally Posted by Hollyj
    You have been together for 1.5 years, and he still does not know. C'mon. This guy is stringing you along


    I still can't give up on him because for 1.5 years everything was ok but now something changed and idk why..

  10. #9

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    Originally Posted by Billie28

    Why are you attracted to him???


    I'm still attracted to him because when we spend time with each other he is amazing. We can do everything together. but when we don't see each other he is like completely different person.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Have you gotten tested for STDs, now that you know he's cheating? You need to. He's lied before and will again.
    Originally Posted by kasiaaa
    1 month ago I've found out that he had a tinder.
    he said he can't commit to me etc.

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