Anxiety Help - Journal

And no, they don't send anyone home. The director was bragging in front of the entire staff about going to a lot of car shows because they don't require masks. He said he likes not having to wear a mask when he attends. So, no help from him!

Awww, that's no good. Crossing fingers for you that you don't get sick.

Sick man in the next cubicle is back. He's coughing repeatedly with no mask on and is also forcefully blowing his nose.

If it's the same guy, maybe it's just allergies and not illness.

If it's the same guy, maybe it's just allergies and not illness.

That's what I'm hoping. I did get sick my first week here but it only lasted about 5 days.

I see why people dislike temping.

The other admins either leave out important information or they give me incorrect instructions and when I make mistakes they blame me. For example, I was given a template to use for orders when I started and was just told today it's the wrong version. And was told in a very snippy manner that I need to use the correct template! And to change it immediately. Well, I clapped back and said the other admin who trained me gave me that template! And I was told, well, it's wrong and you need to be sure to save and use the correct one. And then she told the manager that I'd been using the wrong one without mentioning it was the one I was given BY THEM.

I'm not inclined to stay here any longer than necessary. I will start looking for direct hire work immediately.

How annoying. Obviously that place has problems. People don't act that way unless they're miserable. Good idea to move on!

It's my son's birthday tomorrow and I took the day off and offered to buy him lunch. He picked a cash-only place that has a walk up window that always has a long, long line. I'm petrified, but I can't say no just because I'm afraid. I wanted this to be a really nice day and now it's turned into an anxiety-inducer.

It's my son's birthday tomorrow and I took the day off and offered to buy him lunch. He picked a cash-only place that has a walk up window that always has a long, long line. I'm petrified, but I can't say no just because I'm afraid. I wanted this to be a really nice day and now it's turned into an anxiety-inducer.

Oh goodness. I have a new friend - mid 50s, who is immunocompromised. Adult kids. She and her husband are being extremely careful and they are fine. One of her sons lives near me (she is in the burbs) and does yoga at an indoor studio. So she will not let him come visit them. She said it was such a hard choice but essential. Sad thing is I know of at least a few outdoor yoga classes going on right now - but I guess he's very attached to his studio.

Happy Birthday to your son! Are you supposed to bring the food to his house?

Happy Birthday to your son!

Yes, I am supposed to buy the food and take it to him. I offered to do this but I didn't think he'd pick a place that was cash only and doesn't take phone or online orders or have an online menu.

I told my brother and he "helpfully" told me to just tell myself it will all be fine and that's all I need to do. I've tried to explain to him it doesn't work like that and he says "well, just tell yourself it will work like that!!" He has a bad case of DOES NOT GET IT. I want to ask him if he'd tell someone who had cancer to just tell themselves the cancer will go away and it will! But he's letting me live here so I can't rock the boat.

Thanks for the birthday wishes.

Can you tell your son the thought of this leaves you petrified?

Yes, I am supposed to buy the food and take it to him. I offered to do this but I didn't think he'd pick a place that was cash only and doesn't take phone or online orders or have an online menu.

 

I told my brother and he "helpfully" told me to just tell myself it will all be fine and that's all I need to do. I've tried to explain to him it doesn't work like that and he says "well, just tell yourself it will work like that!!" He has a bad case of DOES NOT GET IT. I want to ask him if he'd tell someone who had cancer to just tell themselves the cancer will go away and it will! But he's letting me live here so I can't rock the boat.

 

Thanks for the birthday wishes.

I would just say plainly "no I don't feel comfortable going there. I can go to (list one or two alternatives). I hope when the pandemic is over I can get you food from there!"

I'm not as anxious as you and I would not go. I was put in an awkward position last month just like this. I responded to the person and said no I would not be cooking a meal in my house and bringing it to a local shelter in a bad neighborhood but I can donate $, ship food, have food delivered, have other items delivered. She pushed back "but I could bring the cooking items to your house?" I stood my ground politely. Yesterday i received a group email that changed the plan -now you can cook and bring the meal to the shelter or you have three other options, including the options I'd mentioned. Hmmmmm. I am the first person to volunteer to help people who are homeless. In non-covid times I would go there by lyft or my husband would drive us or my son would get a tour. It's all different now. People don't always get it. I am happy to educate and stand my ground. Our health is just that important.

Thank you for your support.

I have decided I will drive there and if there's a long line or it just looks like something I don't want to do, I will go get him similar food from a different takeout place. I'm also going to go get some cash in case it looks OK and I feel OK going.

Thank you for your support.

 

I have decided I will drive there and if there's a long line or it just looks like something I don't want to do, I will go get him similar food from a different takeout place. I'm also going to go get some cash in case it looks OK and I feel OK going.

Yes- great plan!!

So, I did it. But the disappointing thing is, I went way outside my comfort zone and the food wasn't even that good. It was cold, refrigerator cold, so they didn't put it in the microwave long enough. I wanted my son to enjoy his birthday lunch and they kind of ruined it.

That stinks.

Sorry to hear that.

Focus on the achievement...you did really well!! You could have stayed home, but then it wouldn't have been a victory and this was a victory. :)

Focus on the achievement...you did really well!! You could have stayed home, but then it wouldn't have been a victory and this was a victory. :)

Very true!

So, I did it. But the disappointing thing is, I went way outside my comfort zone and the food wasn't even that good. It was cold, refrigerator cold, so they didn't put it in the microwave long enough. I wanted my son to enjoy his birthday lunch and they kind of ruined it.

I'm sorry but I'm glad you went! These days I bring all that food home and reheat.

Sorry to hear that. I'm sure your son really appreciated having his mom with him though and that you did that. You tried to make it special, that counts for a lot.

My cousin sent out a group text about the annual family Christmas gathering. Apparently they are having the get together like it's any other year. The host's house is pretty small and in the past it's been pretty crowded. Six families with a total of about 20 people. My brother didn't want to say no although he told me he's not going, so he replied back "maybe". One of my cousins and her family are not going. She's upset because she fears the hosts will be offended. I am definitely not going. My kids haven't decided yet. My nephew is not going.

That branch of the family pretty much thinks Covid is not that big of a thing and that people are overreacting. There will be no distancing, no masks, food will be shared, there will be hugging and people sitting right next to one another. It's a big nope for me.

My brother and cousin aren't sure how to say no. I'm keeping it simple. I'm not going because I am being very careful and don't feel comfortable going especially since I have health issues.

One cousin has always been an arguer. She will demand to know why (she grilled me about why I left my apartment). She will likely insist I'm being silly. But I can be silly if I want to, no? And I don't agree it's silly to avoid gatherings during a pandemic.

My brother is hoping things will be better by then so he and his kids can attend. I feel it's highly unlikely, but if he wants to go that's certainly his choice. I am not going.

Oof. I hear you. I have extended family I have not been seeing and will not. They treat this pandemic like its an inconvenience and a joke. There's a few of thrm who I would really like to see, but I won't while thry have this attitude. I can't trust thrm not to have thrown all caution to the wind and been who knows where with God knows who.

My SO has not seen his sister for a long time, nor has his father seen her. She's a drug addict who regularly falls off the wagon, so she exposes herself to a lot of risks. His dad is in his 70s, and it's breaking his heart not to see her but in my opinion he is doing the right thing. If he got sick, it would likely be his life.

What a crazy time.

I would just say a quiet, polite, firm NO. And perhaps a generic "No, I am not comfortable attending at this time and thanks for the invitation." Then if she is rude and keeps prying just do the relaxed but confident "oh -thanks! No I am not comfortable attending." If there is more prying I would say "so, I'll let you know if I need your advice on what I should do, ok? I'm good and I look forward to seeing you when it's appropriate."

I scheduled another Covid test for tomorrow. I've been working at the office for a month and I keep getting this weird congested, fatigued, sore-ish throat, achy feeling, over and over and over. It concerns me because I can't figure out why it keeps happening. Also cannot, just can NOT, gain any of the lost weight back no matter how much I eat or what I eat. I keep getting the runs (not unusual with my medical condition) and that sure doesn't help.

Anxiety not too bad. Although I got pretty angry last week when one of the other admins chastised me for making a mistake on a process I was trained on THREE WEEKS AGO. She's very abrupt with everyone, borderline contemptuous of people who makes mistakes. She made a mistake a few days ago and I didn't give her crap about it. She seems to think she's perfect.

I scheduled another Covid test for tomorrow. I've been working at the office for a month and I keep getting this weird congested, fatigued, sore-ish throat, achy feeling, over and over and over. It concerns me because I can't figure out why it keeps happening. Also cannot, just can NOT, gain any of the lost weight back no matter how much I eat or what I eat. I keep getting the runs (not unusual with my medical condition) and that sure doesn't help.

 

Anxiety not too bad. Although I got pretty angry last week when one of the other admins chastised me for making a mistake on a process I was trained on THREE WEEKS AGO. She's very abrupt with everyone, borderline contemptuous of people who makes mistakes. She made a mistake a few days ago and I didn't give her crap about it. She seems to think she's perfect.

I'm sorry she was so critical and of course I hope your covid test works out ok! Seems like it will from how you describe what's going on.