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Thread: Guy is being insulting and I'm finding him difficult. Advice?

  1. #21
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    Originally Posted by tattoobunnie
    I dated a guy exactly like this. Ugh, bleh. Totally ghost, and move on. Someone way better out there for you.
    Tragic they are. Can I ask, if you were the one to end it - how did you? Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #22
    Gold Member waffle's Avatar
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    In my younger days I put up with nonsense like this, to my shame. I think my reasons were:

    !) thinking/hoping that maybe at some point he'd see how awesome I was and change his behavior
    2) he was better than nothing

    Regarding #1, that never happens, it actually gets worse, and #2 is simply not true. Cut your losses now. Not sure it even matters how you end it, you just do.

  3. #23
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    Originally Posted by dustycloud
    I agree with the narcissist comment. He told me he has anxiety and was previously on medication - I think itís more that narcs never respond well to medication (Iím in the psych field). Thatís his issue. Thanks sis!
    He is not a narcissist. He is simply a jerk.

    You need to address why YOU would continue with someone like this. I think you should take a long break from dating and address your choices in men- in my past, I have also allowed poor treatment due to low self esteem.

    Just block and delete him. He won't care other than the loss of sex on delivery.
    Last edited by Hollyj; 05-12-2020 at 01:29 PM.

  4. #24
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    The more important question (imo) is why you're selling yourself for such a cheap price. He obviously has no interest in you other than a convenient romp in the sack, (no offense). Keep in mind that we teach people how to treat us, therefore what kind of message are you sending him?

    In short, why not begin by taking the steps to increase your self-esteem?

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  6. #25
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Put your educational/professional energy into patients or academics. Smart toxicologists don't ingest poison to study the effects. Dating is not social work. It doesn't matter what diagnosis you think he has.

    He treats you poorly and you (seem) not to like it, however the way you are backpedaling and want to talk to him etc, suggests you somehow are intrigued by the degrading treatment.
    Originally Posted by dustycloud
    I think itís more that narcs never respond well to medication (Iím in the psych field). Thatís his issue.

  7. #26
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by dustycloud
    Tragic they are. Can I ask, if you were the one to end it - how did you?
    Don't over complicate this. Things like that end with either a mutual ghosting. Basically, he doesn't reach out, you don't reach out. Done. Over.

    Otherwise with a direct rejection. He reaches out, invites you for another degrading evening, you simply say "Sorry this isn't working for me. Wish you better luck with other matches." If he tries to talk back, block, delete. Either way, done. Over.

    Why are you so uncomfortable with saying "No thanks" ?????? That seems to be at the heart of your problems really.....

  8. #27
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
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    I agree with all the "just ghost this weirdo" comments.

    I also think its a good idea to stop dating for awhile. Get in touch with what you're looking for and set boundaries that keep you focused on that.

    No more, this guy might get better! Repeat after me, "guys don't get better. Their effort or lack of effort tells me everything I need to know"

    Spend time with people that matter. When you protect yourself from d-bags, you make room for better.

  9. #28
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Jerks never respond well to medication either. There is no cure for that. So think of creeps like this as covid. Just don't catch it. Speaking of which, did you know covid had been detected in semen so while this dirty dog was mounting you he may have slipped you more than his jerk wand.
    Originally Posted by dustycloud
    I think itís more that narcs never respond well to medication (Iím in the psych field).

  10. #29
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    I have found the answer my my case too. I met a neurosurgeon and he is very arrogant. he thinks he is God because he is smart then he can be a doctor. and i am so lucky girl that he loved me. i am not sure he is still love me as he said a week ago. But i went into NC with him because I know he is not the right one for me. This kind of person will never admit what they did wrong and the are heartless. He was easy to insult me and talk very bad to me and every thing he said is up to you if you want a real love then you have to work it out. and he was so nice to be there like a King to give me chances after chances to get him back. He only cared about his feeling when we had sex. Don't matter how i feel, he just do it and enjoy it himself and like i were just a sex doll. I tried my best many time to talk to him. He kept staying cold. So i dumped him and went to NC. It is already 6 days. he blocked me every where as he did it many times before. THis time i don't give a damn about it.I just deleted his his number then go. i have been patient enough for him. all of my friend told me, I have to care more about my self-esteem and I know it is right thing to do. even I still think about him sometimes. But i know I am doing the right thing. I hope you are also be strong to leave him too. We are deserved with much better one.

  11. #30
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    How long were you dating? Why act like a sex doll? Or since this is the other posters thread, put up with degrading remarks or treatment?
    Originally Posted by Bignomis
    he just do it and enjoy it himself and like i were just a sex doll. So i dumped him and went to NC. It is already 6 days. he blocked me

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