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Thread: Guy is being insulting and I'm finding him difficult. Advice?

  1. #11
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    Originally Posted by smackie9
    Him and these guys are not the issue...you are. You don't set boundaries for yourself when dealing with people that don't seem to fulfill your expectations. You can't expect people to change for you, you have to make change with your judgments/choices. Like I always say, date those only who treat you the way you want to be treated. This guy sounds like he has some kind of personality disorder. This is what is called a "deal breaker". You stop and drop them, move on, that's it, simple as that. Stop making your life complicated by not dating troublesome guys. You need to see yourself as more worthy than what these guys are willing to put out. Stop putting up with it, get some self worth, and work you your self esteem. Tell yourself next time as you dump the guy "I deserve better than this!" Courage and confidence will change your life.
    Would like to clarify, the previous guy in the other post turned out to genuine. He went by a different last name. We've been talking a lot lately and planning on meeting soon. I think I could be in luck this time as we've had some great chats. I appreciate your advice and wholeheartedly believe it often comes from within. Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #12
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    Stop going to his house? I don't get it. You've only seen him a few times. You don't even have a bad excuse to keep going over if you aren't comfortable. Dude's an ass, but honestly you keep going over there and banging him. For all he knows or cares, it's all a kink for you.

    Don't sit down and address it. There's no point. Take a break from dating if you're finding yourself stuck or confused in the most escapable situations and over people you've barely gotten to know.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    You have been reduced to nothing more than an object. He won't look at you, he shuts down conversations and is condescending.
    And what do think of someone who insists on only entering you from behind and finished quickly suggests?
    You've already caught on that it doesnt come close to making love. Because it's not and it won't ever be
    You are on object for his pleasure. Nothing more.
    Believe you deserve better.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    This guy is a complete jerk with no redeeming qualities. Dump him. Block and delete from your phone and social media. Learn to choose better partners. You can do so much better.

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  6. #15
    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    Tell him that you've decided you're not a good fit for each other and wish him good luck.

  7. #16
    Member cmf1011's Avatar
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    Ghost this tool! He makes it pretty clear that he doesnít care about your thoughts and he almost seems to enjoy degrading you. Sounds like a borderline narcissist to me. You deserve a lot better than this and Iím sure you can find way better. He ainít the one sis. Kick him to the curb.

  8. #17
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    I dated a guy exactly like this. Ugh, bleh. Totally ghost, and move on. Someone way better out there for you.

  9. #18
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
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    As a guy I gringe when I read stories like these.

    Please stop making excuses or giving these men more time to improve. Most people will be on their very best behavior early on. They may be nervous and not totally themselves until comfortable but this behavior is terrible and purposeful. When someone shows you who they are BELIEVE THEM.

    Either he is a total jerk or he is trying some sort of mind game to keep you on your heels all the time to serve his whims.

    I agree with all the others. He is a jerk in bed, jerk on a walk, jerk when you drink coffee, jerk on the phone and probably a jerk when he is asleep. I am not sure how he made it past the first meet.

    Do you even know what you are looking for in a man? That may be a good place to start.

    Adjust your picker and you will be fine.

    Lost

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by lostandhurt
    As a guy I gringe when I read stories like these.

    Please stop making excuses or giving these men more time to improve. Most people will be on their very best behavior early on. They may be nervous and not totally themselves until comfortable but this behavior is terrible and purposeful. When someone shows you who they are BELIEVE THEM.

    Either he is a total jerk or he is trying some sort of mind game to keep you on your heels all the time to serve his whims.

    I agree with all the others. He is a jerk in bed, jerk on a walk, jerk when you drink coffee, jerk on the phone and probably a jerk when he is asleep. I am not sure how he made it past the first meet.

    Do you even know what you are looking for in a man? That may be a good place to start.

    Adjust your picker and you will be fine.

    Lost
    Perfectly said! Thank you for also being disgusted at this mans behaviour, itís totally unacceptable.

  11. #20
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    Originally Posted by cmf1011
    Ghost this tool! He makes it pretty clear that he doesnít care about your thoughts and he almost seems to enjoy degrading you. Sounds like a borderline narcissist to me. You deserve a lot better than this and Iím sure you can find way better. He ainít the one sis. Kick him to the curb.
    I agree with the narcissist comment. He told me he has anxiety and was previously on medication - I think itís more that narcs never respond well to medication (Iím in the psych field). Thatís his issue. Thanks sis!

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