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Thread: Grateful to still be here

  1. #1
    Member cmf1011's Avatar
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    Grateful to still be here

    Itís been quite a while since the last time I posted on here and I thought it would beneficial to someone else to talk Iíve been through and experienced in the past 8 months to a year. Itís been a full year since my bf/fiancť of almost 5 years left me, he messed with me all summer, and then dropped a bomb on me that he decided to start dating someone new despite the week prior he told me he missed me, my voice etc. At that point I decided to cut him off, which I did successfully for 3 months. I went on a journey within myself that I hope I never have to go through again, but Iím glad I did. I had some really bad moments where I really didnít want to be alive, and all I could think about was how much better it would be if I wasnít here. I owe a lot of my growth to my friends, they really held me together when I felt like I had nothing left. But nonetheless I still pushed myself everyday to make this life what I want, and not to ever shape myself to how some else wants me to be. Iím so grateful to still be here and it is so interesting how the tables have turned. My ex tried to come back several times because he isnít over me, he broke up with the girl he started dating for me, HE EVEN GOT A TATTOO ABOUT ME. I blocked him on everything I could think of. As for my dating life, things are really good. Iíve been seeing a guy Iíve know for quite literally half of my life and always had a crush on. Though we arenít dating cause neither of us are looking for something serious, itís really nice to take the time to build a connection with someone again and just see where it goes. Heís very nice to me and the best part, heís extremely honest and upfront which is so refreshing.

    I wouldnít go as far as saying I donít think about my ex. Cause I definitely do, I do hope he is okay and making the best choices for himself, but I do know for a fact I donít want him in my life. I have love for him, because you canít just stop having love for someone you were dating for that long. But i can say Iíve moved on successfully and nothing feels better.

    The only way out is through. And once you get there you wonít ever want to go back. I promise you that. Let your friends be there for you when you need it. Donít be like me and hold everything to yourself so you seem strong, talk about how you feel and listen to what people have to say even if you might not like it. I thought I would never ever get through, but I see Iím worth so much more than what I thought I was worth. You are too. Donít let dishonest/toxic people get in the way of that. You got it, you do. You really do. A year from now things can be totally different, but the only way to get there is to NOT give up.
    Last edited by cmf1011; 05-10-2020 at 01:26 AM.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Good job. It sounds like you really pulled yourself up by your bootstraps. I went back and read some of your past posts and it looks like you took a lot of smart steps. Keep of the good work!

  3. #3
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Keep up the great work! Your life is what you make it !

  4. #4
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
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    Love life keep growing take care

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  6. #5
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    It sounds like youíve made a lot of positive progress! Good for you!

  7. #6
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    I am happy for you and I hope I can reach to the point you are now so soon. I am on 15th day of NC. Still think about him but don't cry anymore. Carry on!

  8. #7
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    Congrats with your progress girl! I know it isn't easy, but it sounds like you're making the right steps towards a better future.

  9. #8
    Member cmf1011's Avatar
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    @bignomis Trust me you will!! It takes a long time and itís something have to work on day in and day out. Just remember donít be too harsh on yourself, youíre going through a really hard time in life. Also remember, you arenít alone because there is always someone going through the same as you

  10. #9
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Good to hear a success story.
    Originally Posted by cmf1011
    I blocked him on everything I could think of. As for my dating life, things are really good. Iíve been seeing a guy Iíve know for quite literally half of my life and always had a crush on. Though we arenít dating cause neither of us are looking for something serious, itís really nice to take the time to build a connection with someone again and just see where it goes.


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