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Thread: Social Media

  1. #1

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    Social Media

    I have been with this man for about 3 years , at first when we met I let the social media thing go because he had said no to adding me on social media and I just assumed itís because he hadnít gotten to know me well yet . A year went by and we were still not friends on social media , I met his friends but havenít met his family . I am still currently a college student graduating soon , and we have been together throughout college . Last year I found his Instagram profile that was public and a couple weeks went by and his Instagram was now put on private right after I found it , he doesnít post on their but it was odd why all over sudden his profile was put to private . His Facebook is private and he says he doesnít use it at all so thereís no point of us adding each other on social media . For me itís always on the back of my mind that he might be hiding something , because why is this part of his life so private from me , I am an open book and have nothing to hide but for me it feels like he is hiding and not to do with privacy . Iím I shallow for wanting to end this relationship because of the social media thing ? Is social media a thing to worry about in a relationship ?

  2. #2
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Ok, so you havent met his family in the 3 yrs you've been with him? Private facebook? Yup I'd say he's hiding something - like perhaps a wife or live in girlfriend.

  3. #3
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    A lot of people say itís silly to worry about social media on here but I would find it really off putting to not be added. Like, youíre friends arenít you? People add barely acquaintances online but not their partner? Iíd feel like I was being excluded from a facet of their life (that is by no stretch of the imagination private) too.

  4. #4
    Member cmf1011's Avatar
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    Itís really hard in a digital age when EVERYONE has Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram etc. Especially where these apps often offer options to keep certain things private. This is a MAJOR red flag. Get out while you still can, my ex of almost 5 years did the same thing to me when I came back to facebook, he refused to be my friend for a couple of months. I didnít think much of it at the time, but I know better now that he was more than likely being unfaithful. Someone that has nothing to hide doesnít act like that especially when they are dating you. You deserve better, I promise you

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  6. #5
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    You haven't met his family in three years! You are defiantly a secret. How often do you hang out with his friends? How often do you stay over at his home? What do you do when you meet up for dates and where do you go?

  7. #6

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    I have hanged out with his friends before , I have gone to his house as well . Most of his family does stay in a different country , his close family like brothers and sisters live in a different state . But I have met his close friend, when we meet up for dates we go to public places , he moved for a completely different town to the town I am so he can be closer to me . Thatís why I was ignoring this social media thing but itís now been three years

  8. #7
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    I think of social media as being ďa thingĒ kind of in the context of, say, cleanliness. Things are easier if youíre on the same page, harder when youíre not.

    I could spin this a few ways, but what strikes me as most concerning is that youíre scared to bring it up with him. Why do you think that is?

  9. #8

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    The very first time I brought it up this was when we initially started dating he got upset so I let it be and havenít brought it up since then . But more and more itís been bothering me and I push it to the side but I canít ignore it anymore . Especially when I found his page on Instagram and it was instantly put to private .

  10. #9
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    I'm sorry, but I agree that he is hiding something here.

    You say he's from a different country. Is there perhaps cultural or religious difference between you two that his family might not approve of?

    Have you ever met any friends who knew him in his home country as well?

  11. #10
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    Was also wondering about perhaps cultural differences!?
    But then again that doesnít make sense re his Instagram?

    Have you actually ever sent him a friend request on fb?
    Since you have not brought it up with him in 3 years , how do you know he wouldnít be open to accepting you as a friend now?

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