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Thread: Should I wait on him?

  1. #21

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    Apr 2020
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    Thank you for this. Itís always on my mind. Iím worried it will never change and is why Iím trying to set up no contact with him. I canít be the punching bag for his poor decisions and just not making decisions in general. He canít seem to figure out any of his life and I know we are young, but he is old enough to not be this aloof. I think he may always be this way

  2. #22

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    Apr 2020
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    Sadly no. I wish there was so I could chalk it up to that. He is genuinely just being manipulative and having some type of crisis. Heís been like this for a while.. I do think I may need to block him in order to cut him out of my life.

  3. #23

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    Apr 2020
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    Very true. I need to cut contact. He needs a LOT of help.

  4. #24
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Try to reflect on why you have been putting up with this for so long? Ask your parents to take you to a doctor/therapist to address and sort some things out. Is there trouble at home? Are you depressed? Do have low self-respect? You can examine all that with the help of a doctor/therapist.

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  6. #25
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Narcisistic and Bipolar are personality disorders. They never, ever go away. I think it would help to acknowledge that fact.
    You keep referring to this as an opportunity to change his behavior. But this isn't a behavioral issue.
    It's a disorder.
    That with depression and avoidance?
    I think he did you a favor by letting you go.

  7. #26

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    Apr 2020
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    He is in quarantine right now with his brother, canít hangout with other people where he lives.. donít think thatís the case and he swore on everything it isnít. To me it seemed more like manipulation to string me along

  8. #27

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    Apr 2020
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    Yes Iíve been depressed since the passing of my mom. I go to therapy! He was one of the people around during that time and think I hav trauma bonded to him.

  9. #28

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    Apr 2020
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    Also kept telling me loves me. Was kind of pathetic acting and like a ploy for sympathy

  10. #29

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    Apr 2020
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    Thank you for this response! It feels like a lot of it is hard for me to see as Iím pretty inexperienced. So your ex really never figured it out? I also think I deserve more than this.
    I went through a period of being toxic/unhealthy in the relationship due to the passing of my mom, and I actually did the work to become a better person again. He has not after promising he was in a better place when we got back together. It feels unfair, but also like I owe him that for dealing with me when I was a mess?

  11. #30

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    Apr 2020
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    I didnít realize they were things that couldnít go away. I guess ive been comparing it to depression/anxiety for me which can improve when on right meds/therapy. He doesnít even seem to think heís bipolar despite a therapist hinting (strongly) that he is. It may be best for me in the long run.

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