Ex reached out , playing me ?

Hi all,

After 9 months of on again off again relationship I ended things 1 1/2 month ago. I really love him , but he was hurtful. I am really struggling through the grief and loss of what I thought our relationship could have been.

He I believe is an alcoholic. He manipulated me, broke promises, stonewalled and gave me the silent treatment throughout our relationship. He was also kind complimentary, fun and we had great chemistry. He borrowed money from me. (Shame on me) . After 35 days NC he reached out asking how I was and telling me he’s wants to pay me some of what he owes me this week. Well, he gets paid tomorrow and I am future freaking ! I know he is not going to reach out and pay me , but I have some hope that he will. I know when tomorrow comes and he doesn’t contact me to pay me I will be heartbroken all over and feel used once again.

I need some advice as to what I can tell myself when it doesn’t happen to not feel completely discarded as always. I know I know I broke it off with him , it had nothing to do with me not loving him , I did it to save myself.

Thanks for any advice you may have.

Thread already exists, (Below).

https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=564272