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Thread: Boyfriend's Pornography Addiction

  1. #11
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Don't kid yourself he's still doing it. Without regular interaction with a therapist, he has nothing under control. Sex addicts can't quit.

    You have to ask yourself, how can you "love" a man that brings you such grief and brokenness??? Why are you not focused on how damaging this is to your own mental health? What is truly keeping you from leaving him? Fear? Loneliness? Anxiety? Financial? You keep asking "How can he do this to me?" well it's because you won't leave him. Your choice to stay, you are bring this on yourself after you had gain knowledge of what he was up to. There is nothing that is going to make this go away except having the courage to end this relationship. Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Gracie77
    The porn led deeper into desires of what society deems as inappropriate..and pretty much illegal.
    The fact is, porn probably didn't "lead him" to have those desires. Those desires were already in him. Instead of suppressing them, he chose to seek out porn and indulge them.

    Originally Posted by Gracie77
    Everyone that comes into my life causes me some sort of heart break. I've never really told anyone this because I have no one to tell..... I'm stuck and I need help, or just some comfort. I feel so alone.
    You feel alone because you are isolating yourself from the wrong people. You are breaking your own heart with your repeated bad decision to cut out all but the guilty party (your boyfriend) from your life.

    You seem to be blaming everyone but him for his actions: your best friend, your sister, the porn industry.

    He is the one doing these things.

    If you want to feel better, you must isolate yourself from him forever.

  3. #13

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    No more replies

    Please do not reply to this thread anymore. Thank you

  4. #14
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Why not? Are you unwilling to remove this guy from your life? If so, why? What positive does he bring to your life?

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  6. #15
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    This guy sounds disgusting. How do you not know that he has not abused children. How can you be with him in any capacity?

    You gave up you relationship with your sister and best friend for this guy! What exactly do you love about him?

  7. #16
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    "Stop being a martyr. You are not stuck nor are you alone. You chose to dump your friends and family so he can jerk off to them? Think about that." Spot on! This guy sounds absolutely gross!

    By staying, you have said all of this is okay. Do you usually chose creepy men like this?

  8. #17
    Silver Member dion333's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Gracie77
    My boyfriend has struggled with pornography for a while. The porn led deeper into desires of what society deems as inappropriate..and pretty much illegal. I've helped him past that and he doesn't watch things like that anymore. I also found out he would go on Facebook and look at other pictures of girls and masturbate to their photos/face. A month ago I found out in the past (just after 2 years into our relationship) he looked at/masturbated to photos of my one actual best friend. Which I don't talk to anymore cause it hurts. Not only that but to my older sister as well... Which really screwed me up. He says he's sorry and he's actually changed since then it's just I'm absolutely broken inside. I'm so in love with this man, and I'm still with him. It breaks my heart to know that I wasn't first on his mind, I was always last. I feel like I only have myself to trust and comfort me. Everyone that comes into my life causes me some sort of heart break. I've never really told anyone this because I have no one to tell. I don't have a best friend anymore and my relationship with my sister (which has grown over the years) has and is deteriorating rapidly. I barely speak to her nor enjoy speaking to her because of this whole thing. In my mind I think with time my heart will heal and I will have a peace of mind. I've forgiven him for doing those things but I guess I haven't forgiven him fully. I don't know how many times I've cried over this or go look at the photos he's looked at. I'm stuck and I need help, or just some comfort. I feel so alone.
    That is seriously F'd up! He needs serious help. If he can't break this habit dump him or destroy your own mind and self. I know its easy for me to say, but you need to let him go, unless he seek serious help, but even then, i think it's better to let him go, after the sick stuff h's got caught up in. Porn is lethal and this p[roves it. Hope you both find peace of mind

  9. #18
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    You've allowed yourself to be so downgraded that you're placing this man's sick disturbances and his lust for other women, over your own self worth.

    YOU have to fix that. He has quite bad off issues. You're not going to fix him.

    He doesn't love you. This is not love. Until you stop seeing him as someone who is decent towards you, you're never going to get out of the cycle of abuse.
    He is slowly destroying your life, but you are the one allowing it.

    You have no other choice but to leave him for good.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by Gracie77
    Please do not reply to this thread anymore. Thank you
    It sounds like she has no intention of doing anything to improve her emotional well being. If she didn't like everyone's replies I wonder what she was hoping we'd say?

  11. #20
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by poorlittlefish
    It sounds like she has no intention of doing anything to improve her emotional well being. If she didn't like everyone's replies I wonder what she was hoping we'd say?
    Probably wanted to know how to "get" him to stop.

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