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Thread: I don't know if I've upset her, she's bored of me or if she is just being nice..

  1. #1

    I don't know if I've upset her, she's bored of me or if she is just being nice..

    Hi all, thanks for reading. Let me just start off by saying that I've never been very good at communicating with women in a flirty sense and I really struggle to see their "hidden" meanings and all that kinda stuff.
    Without going into too much personal details, recently I started speaking with a girl from Instagram who does amateur modelling so this girl has a LOT of attention from other men but we started speaking on Whatsapp and for the first week or two she really did seem to like me a lot, she seemed very flirty, replied to my messages pretty quickly even though she is a very busy girl and has lots of guys messaging her all the time. I know she thinks I'm a lovely guy and she has even called me an angel a few times and even said I was beautiful. She is usually pretty liberal with her use of emoji's and kisses in messages also. Now because I really felt like I clicked with her pretty much from the beginning and I honestly do really like her, but I like her in such a way that I feel like I'm treading on egg shells with everything I say, I didn't want to bite instantly and come on to her hard because she'd just think I was just another desperate follower that wants to get into her knickers so I'm trying my hardest to avoid looking like "that guy".
    As I said earlier, she is a very busy girl, I know that and so I feel that not constantly messaging her all the time and replying to her instantly will show that not only am I not a needy person but also respect that she has a life and needs her space. I am not trying to play any games, please don't get that impression, I just can't afford to make her dislike me.
    I know being clingy and needy is a massive turn-off but at the same time I wish I could talk with her more.
    I've noticed that after last week when I showed her some screenshots of a conversation between me and some other girl that she seems a bit off, like she seems shorter in her messaging and started replying a day or two later.

    I have not confronted her about this yet, she may very well just be busy with other things but I feel like I've either upset her
    or annoyed her in some way with the screenshots I showed to her. I don't want to make myself look a fool and/or scare her away at all, personally I think I might be best confronting her and apologising for upsetting her, if I have done, would she appreciate that?
    I feel so dumb but I really like this girl a lot and hope to one day push things further. Would love to be in a relationship with her, I usually hate talking to women but she is different. I do get really upset when I see she's not messaged back in over a day but I don't show it for obvious reasons as stated above.
    I think if I have upset her at all, in some f***** up way that's sort of a good thing right? For me at least. She obviously does like me if she's upset at me for something.
    That's how I see it anyway, because I get really mixed signals from her recently. In one of her last messages she was pretty short and brief but did end it with "Lots of love xxx"
    and she calls me "babe" all the time. I'm not too good at knowing exactly the meaning of how women convey their feelings through texting and it really confuses me.

    I think I am just going to ask her what's wrong and tell her I am sorry for if I have upset her, which I am. I like her so much
    I DO actually care about her well-being very much and not just my own. If I've f***** myself over somehow then I'm gonna really hate myself forever.
    I'm in my mid 20's and haven't been in a relationship for what seems like an eternity, and wasn't actively seeking one either until she came along. I don't plan on telling her how I really feel about her though until we get to know each other a bit more at least because I'm just going to look like a creep then, but as it stands at the moment, she seems annoyed at me and so we can't converse when she's replying a day later and being pretty short. I know most of you will just pull the "She's not interested. Move on" card but the reason I'm here is because I'm almost 100% positive she likes me a bit more than other guys she speaks to, she gave very, very strong impressions earlier on before the whole screenshot incident and did seem keen on talking with me and such. She might just be bored of me I guess..but like a day before this incident, she sent me a little personal video thanking me for something I did for her
    but the next day I showed her the screenshots and she seems not as interested anymore.

    I need to just let her know that I can tell she's upset with me and apologise don't I? I just feel like if I say or do the wrong thing then I'll lose her for good.
    Please, please, please only give me serious and detailed answers that are actually helpful. I will not take "she's not interested in you" for an answer, I just know she is sweet on me and I can win her one day. I think I'm pretty attractive
    and I'm also about 6 foot 6 and don't act needy and desperate, so I'm pretty confident that I stand out from the rest of the masses anyway but just struggle with all these "hidden" messages and signs. I'm just s*** at texting!
    I guess what I should really be asking is am I likely to be able to develop a more interesting relationship with her again if I try and make amends and apologise to her after what I may have done to upset her?

    Sorry that this post is so long and probably all over the place, I'm just quietly dying over here and need some advice before my head falls off. Thank you all so much in advance for reading and sharing your thoughts/advice on the matter. Very much appreciate the help! :)

  2. #2
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    What exactly was the content of the screenshot conversation, and why did you share it with her?

    I can already tell you that you very over-invested in this, though. From what I can understand, you have never met her in person. This is simply someone you're texting with. Don't let the emojis and "babes" blur your perspective so much. You still have no idea who the person is on any really genuine level. You also have no clue how many other guys she might be talking to in exactly the same way. Try to relax and not get so attached to the outcome.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    She may be interested but it seems she is looking for fans, not a relationship.
    Originally Posted by MartinSeptim
    I started speaking with a girl from Instagram who does amateur modelling so this girl has a LOT of attention from other men I will not take "she's not interested in you" for an answer

  4. #4
    Hi, MissCanuck! Thanks for taking the time to reply.

    For the sake of convenience in this reply I will refer to the girl I like as girl A and the other person as girl B.

    Basically, the contents of the screenshots were an argument between me and girl B. I showed girl A because we got onto the subject and she said she loved drama and I had nothing to hide so I just sent her the screenshots to prove how much of a psycho B**** this girl B actually was, long story short. The reason I think girl A may be annoyed at me is because in these screenshots it's obvious based off what girl B says to me that we were sexting at some point. Girl B said my penis was incapable of ever turning her on pretty much, so girl A knows I have sent pics and stuff like that, so I feel she liked me and I have let her down.

    Aside from this argument, I honestly dropped contact with this girl B round about when I started speaking with girl A, because I genuinely like her and would love to develop a relationship with her one day. I know I don't know her much at all but that is kind of the whole point in this post, I am so interested in her that I aim to at least try. All relationships start somewhere. I am just finding it difficult at the moment to progress with her any further because she's being pretty confusing atm and sending mixed signals.

    Despite taking a day or two to reply to some messages and being a little short with me, I can't help but feel she still likes me and that I have upset her. Like I think that she thinks I'm some sort of man-slag that is trying to lead her on to get into her knickers. That is honestly so far away from true though, I am just not like that, I prefer romance and love over mindless sex with random people, I was just having a bit of fun with girl B but after speaking with A, I 'm dead set on her and totally uninterested in anyone else.
    I've shot myself in the though, unless she accepts my apology and believes me I won't be able to converse more deeply with her, so I wont get a chance with her. As a woman yourself, what exactly is my best course of action to prove my worth so to speak?

    I know this is an odd situation to be in, I just need the guidance because if she wasn't at all interested in me she'd make it clear rather than signal that she's pissed at me, wouldn't she?.
    I should just suck it up and apologise for upsetting her, right? Surely that will go a long way and she will appreciate it.

    Thank you so much for your swift reply btw, I very much appreciate any help I can get.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    It is creepy to send this. Why send her lewd conversations/material?

    It's amazing she didn't block you after sending private conversations from others. Now she knows you have zero boundaries or respect for girls and could forward her communications.
    Originally Posted by MartinSeptim
    I just sent her the screenshots to prove how much of a psycho B**** this girl B actually was. in these screenshots it's obvious based off what girl B says to me that we were sexting at some point. Girl B said my penis was incapable of ever turning her

  7. #6
    Hi, Wiseman2! Thanks for the reply.

    I did consider that to be the case at first and that's why I stupidly didn't bite. It's only because I gave her the fan attention she was after but still she shows she is a bit more interested than just that.
    Not all of her fans get to speak to her apparently, I see a lot of them whinging that their DM's get ignored and whatnot, and she pops up to me..or did at least before I ticked her off. I get strong impressions that she is definitely signalling something.. I highly doubt all her thousand odd followers feel the same way as I do. It's honestly pretty damn confusing.

  8. #7
    Ikr, she didn't block me so clearly she wants me to apologise for that. And how exactly is it creepy? you don;t know exactly how we got onto that subject to be completely fair. And that is not true at all, I do have respect for women that deserve it.

  9. #8
    Btw, she literally only mentioned that I sent her a pic at one point in the past. You've got the wrong impression, I did not send her a bunch of sexting, I sent part of and argument that happened to contain evidence that me and this other girl were sexting at some point

  10. #9
    I know I screwed up here. I don;t think it was "creepy" but definitely of bad taste. How does one go about apologising for something like this?

  11. #10
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    How often do you see this woman in person? How many dates have you been on with her?

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