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Thread: im being bullied at work!

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Even though your manager is your manager and not your friend, she is not treating you with respect. You're working in a toxic environment which is mentally unhealthy for you.

    Don't question who is supposed to initiate approaching whom because it doesn't matter. The longer you remain silent and stoic, the longer this mental abuse will continue which will make your workplace a pure living daily hell.

    Your boss's refusal to be compassionate upon your attendance at a funeral is uncalled for and shameful.

    If you refuse to budge regarding asking your boss for a meeting or at least a phone call to discuss these disrespectful issues at the workplace, then you'll have to silently endure your working conditions for the sake of earning a living. It's put up and shut up or squeaky wheel gets the grease.

    Ok, let us know what happens when all this passes over but don't hold your breath.

    If your workplace continues to be unbearable, find another nearby salon with a boss and co-workers who know how to treat you with common sense respect and kindness. This way, you'll remain within your locale and retain your client base. This is what my hairstylist had done.

    If it's too hot in the kitchen, get out!

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Much smarter to just resign if illegal activities are happening. Whining about "sneering" is nonsense if the cops had shown up and arrested the entire bunch of you. Hop out of this litter-box.🐈 The onus is on You to change.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by larkrose
    why do i feel so ostracized and wrong for doing the right thing?... some advice please!
    You should have been able to report illegal activity without fear of repercussion. It's pretty clear that your entire work environment is toxic. As the saying goes, one bad apple spoils the entire bunch.

    Gaslighting is tough because it's so easy for the other person to deny their part in it.

    However, you can tell it's happening because they deny it, and from their reluctance to help you.

    Rest assured that a normal person will listen to you if you have a problem. They will make a genuine effort to correct the situation, rather than pile all of the blame on you and your supposed character defects.

    A gaslighter will always make it out like you're the one who has the problem. That's the whole point.

    It's what weakling, passive aggressive people do because they are helpless cowards (like all bullies).

    Other weaklings are attracted to bullies because they are confused or ignorant about the nature of true power.

    You are not one of these people, which is why you reported the illegal behavior. You are not so desperate for approval (even though you wouldn't mind having some).

    Unfortunately, recognizing the situation does not help you.

    Workplace bullying is the toughest form of bullying to deal with because it's always passive aggressive like this. It's almost always two or more against one.

    And you can't simply punch the bully in the face like you can in the playground. That's really the best thing to do with a bully, but unfortunately there are real consequences for these measures in adulthood.

    I think what you have to do is develop relationships with other coworkers, look into working under another manager, or perhaps even consider a change of location.

    There are definitely healthier environments in which to work. I'd seriously consider changing jobs. Why fight to remain stressed out and unappreciated?

  4. #14
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    sigh... your responses are well thought out... i hear all of you... but... BUT... i consider myself a good employee... i have been at this salon for 15 years... thats a long time... i have been through many managers and never have i had one complaint... i am much older than this current manager and her being "friends" with me outside of the salon are not that important to me... i never understood her fascination w me anyway... im really not that interesting... anyway... i did call my supervisor who is going to look into this... the virus is upon us and that is on hold for now... the salon is closed and from the way it looks, won't be open for some time... i have been told that this will be taken care of... noone needs to be polite and i dont deserve to be respected?... (i disagree)...period... dont u agree?... in a salon situation we are supposed to be all welcoming, all smiling, all nice... why shouldn't i ask for the same treatment?... you dont have to like or love me... just be polite... and as for someone smoking pot?... sorry guys... i dont give a hoot if its legal in nj... i dont want a "high" stylist cutting my hair... its so unprofessional!...

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by larkrose
    i have been told that this will be taken care of... noone needs to be polite and i dont deserve to be respected?...
    That's absurd. Only a sorry sack would believe that.

    Originally Posted by larkrose
    the virus is upon us and that is on hold for now... the salon is closed and from the way it looks, won't be open for some time...
    Maybe this whole COVID break will give people time to clear their minds.

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