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Thread: Should BF expects me to pay rent?

  1. #61
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Did your parents happen to buy you that apartment?

  2. #62
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    Do not expect men to treat you like your parents have.
    Exactly.

    As I was saying earlier, love and business are two separate issues. Guilting your boyfriend into paying all of the rent and then complaining when he doesn't, is manipulative and spoilt.

    Also, saying "you would pay for him" really doesn't come into this as you and he are two different people and you can't expect everyone to fall into line depending on the choices YOU make.
    If he expects rent, that has nothing to do whatsoever with love and everything to do with getting a bill paid.

    Stop confusing the two.

  3. #63
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Since money is the argument here, move back into your paid off apartment and see if your relationship with him will improve because money is no longer an issue between you two.

    Remember: "Love don't pay the rent."

    Moving back into your apartment will save you tremendous amounts of money every month. Also, with COVID-19 pandemic, you're safer and there's less exposure for your health's sake. It's a win-win.

  4. #64
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    Move back home.

    1) its financially stupid to abandon something you own to pay rent somewhere unless by absolute necessity (relocated for work for 4 months out of state but will be returning back home after, for example). It would be smarter for him to move in with you.
    2) If two people both have their own places -- buying groceries or covering some of the extras when you are staying at someone else's place - playing house for a week at a time is just good manners. OR if you trade off at eachother's places, you both pay everything for your own places and the visitor treats for dinner. But go home.
    3) go back home and quarantine in place.
    4) If you are not able to go back home right now because you put everything in storage or moved all your stuff to his place, treat it as if you were spending the night. Pay for groceries spring for the netflix or whatever extras. Do not pay him any rent.
    That's just my two cents.

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  6. #65
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    Originally Posted by j.man
    Now you're getting it.

    Noticing your old apartment was "paid off" without any indication of by whom exactly, a whole lot is starting to make sense.
    Yes, if she bought the apartment herself, she would treat it as precious gold - pride in ownership and her security. She would not abandon it to go play house. She would rent it out should she find the love of her life and get married eventually to sell it when it made sense or to have as her "premarital property" to have something of her own to rent. If she is smart, she will move back home and spend nights with her boyfriend a few nights a week when "stay in place" is over.

  7. #66
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    I get if you're living there to at least split utilities since your presence would drive those up, if he's had no issue paying for the same apartment before you moved in, I dont really get why he can't just let you not pay rent, considering you still have to finance your old place. I would understand if he was thinking about finding a smaller place/cheaper place after his lease ended, then he would be paying more than he planned to for this lease period.

    To simplify things I would move back into that apartment until you find a new tenant and go from there. I dont think he is being selfish, I see this situation and handling of finances kind of like culture or meal restrictions. some people view money differently than others, that's just how they were taught or reasoned how it works. His view just happens to be on a different side of the spectrum than me and you.

  8. #67
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Medium0
    I get if you're living there to at least split utilities since your presence would drive those up, if he's had no issue paying for the same apartment before you moved in, I dont really get why he can't just let you not pay rent, considering you still have to finance your old place. I would understand if he was thinking about finding a smaller place/cheaper place after his lease ended, then he would be paying more than he planned to for this lease period.

    To simplify things I would move back into that apartment until you find a new tenant and go from there. I dont think he is being selfish, I see this situation and handling of finances kind of like culture or meal restrictions. some people view money differently than others, that's just how they were taught or reasoned how it works. His view just happens to be on a different side of the spectrum than me and you.
    She said her place is paid off.

  9. #68
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    I know, i just figured cuz Idk which city she is in but in my state property taxes r huge, the taxes on my house are almost the same as a mortgage payment, Itís still money to own :/

  10. #69
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    I've got a funny feeling mom and dad are taking care of most things for the OP hence her starting this thread.

  11. #70
    Platinum Member Heather Dawn's Avatar
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    Your apartment is paid off - but he still has rent to pay for his. Why wouldn't you offer to pay 50% of the rent when you move in with him? You're not LOSING money on your own apartment if it's already paid off, so you're essentially asking him to foot the bill of what will now be a shared living space, while you just live for free.

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