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Thread: has my friend moved on?

  1. #21
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    I never ever even implied it was applicable to anyone but me let alone everyone on this earth. My opinion stands -I think it's a shame when women dump close friends just because they get married and/or have a child. Not saying you did at all. Just generally and in response to what the OP wrote. Not you. I get that you have different values about friendships. You're entitled of course.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Batya33
    I never ever even implied it was applicable to anyone but me let alone everyone on this earth. My opinion stands -I think it's a shame when women dump close friends just because they get married and/or have a child. Not saying you did at all. Just generally and in response to what the OP wrote. Not you. I get that you have different values about friendships. You're entitled of course.
    Dumping is mutual. I'm certainly not going to put forth the effort to socialize if the other person isn't reciprocal nor shares my same enthusiasm and vice versa. Not everyone is willing to cultivate, nurture and maintain friendships long term. Friendships fizzle and fade for a reason. It's a two way street. What goes around comes around.

    People are very busy with their own lives. Some people have more time, interest, energy and money than others. Everyone has different values about friendships. Just keep in mind that there needs to be concerted effort in order for friendships to thrive and endure. Not every friendship was meant for the long haul which is universal.

  3. #23
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    Agreed. I made a somewhat separate point about my personal opinion on a specific situation. I agree with your general point of course. I know of too many women over the years who view close friendships as disposable once they get engaged, married or have a child / and some wait until their close friends have done all their bidding for the wedding activities or various showers before taking the smug married route.

    Luckily not a majority and itís an attitude I find shameful and certainly short sighted particularly when perhaps the marriage doesnít go so well - or heaven forbid the spouse becomes ill or passss away etc. but even if itís great Iíve seen women regret this decision later for various reasons including maturity or simple self absorption when they realize they ďneedĒ some sort of support from the friend who understandably moved on after being discarded.
    And luckily there are many people who donít view close friendships this way - I originally raised this particularly because of the OPs concerns. Nothing at all to do with you or your opinions. As I wrote youíre entitled! I hope the OP is feeling better about the situation !

  4. #24
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    This thread has run its course...Closed.

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