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Thread: Really Dumb Argument

  1. #11
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    When there is contempt, a cut off of communication, frustration, arguments with no resolution, then this relationship has a zero chance of survival.

    The 4 housemen of the apocalypse, the predictor of a relationship destined to failure :Criticism, Defensiveness, Contempt and Stonewalling. Time to be done with this guy.

  2. #12
    Gold Member angrythoughts's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    Firstly: How utterly selfish and entitled of you. Since you think you know so much about the virus, You know that you could contract it but not show any symptoms and then give it to a more vulnerable demographic, right?

    Secondly: You are with the wrong man. I don't know him but I'm thinking he could do better.

    Keep yourself blocked by blocking him and get on with finding someone you get along with better. Someone that can reason with you about things that you are being selfish and entitled about.
    No one asked your opinion on her views on the virus. She said sheís not THAT concerned, not that sheís going around licking the floors and coughing on grandma at the supermarket. Her bf says the flu isnít a virus which obviously which shows he definitely did not know much, being that the flu IS a virus. She jokingly said he doesnít know anything.

    I think the OP could do better and find someone that can express their emotions without completely going NC for no explained reason.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member milly007's Avatar
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    I don't agree with how either of you dealt with the situation.

    Him blocking you is childish, but it doesn't seem like your views regarding the virus are any more mature.

    Just an FYI regarding the coronavirus, but my main concern isn't so much myself in this situation (being young & healthy), but the possibility of contracting the virus and exposing it to others with a weakened immune system.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by angrythoughts
    No one asked your opinion on her views on the virus. She said sheís not THAT concerned, not that sheís going around licking the floors and coughing on grandma at the supermarket. Her bf says the flu isnít a virus which obviously which shows he definitely did not know much, being that the flu IS a virus. She jokingly said he doesnít know anything.

    I think the OP could do better and find someone that can express their emotions without completely going NC for no explained reason.
    I know when I wanna crack a good joke, I tell my wife she knows nothing about something and then badger her with follow-up questions on the topic. Then after essentially bullying her with questions I know she can't answer, I tell her I'd be better off just Googling it. It's always a hit. After she's done rolling on the floor laughing, I get laid immediately guaranteed.

    Telling him the flu actually is a virus is a good smirk and snort moment if you've got nothing else going for your smarts I suppose, but at the end of the day, her dismissal of the public health risk she poses going out absent a necessity shows a whole lot of people could run laps around her if she so wanted to sing praises of her own intelligence or bash that of others. The acute and respiratory nature of coronaviruses does indeed merit their distinction from your typical virus, and especially influenza. He was ignorant as to how to phrase it, but frankly, most people are. Don't know you personally, but the poor attempt at hyperbole would suggest you're just as well among the representative norm there. At least he had a grasp on the important aspects. He's staying in and encouraging others not to risk vulnerable populations by going out unnecessarily. All she's got going for her is she knows the flu is a virus. Gold medal is in the mail.

    FWIW, don't think OP deserves better. Certainly not going to claim whether she can do better. People who latch onto areas someone else happens to be somewhat ignorant about only to make it a theme pestering them and bullying them about it tend not to. Conversely, people who block partners to cope with an argument don't either, but she's here, not him.

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  6. #15
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    Originally Posted by milly007
    I don't agree with how either of you dealt with the situation.

    Him blocking you is childish, but it doesn't seem like your views regarding the virus are any more mature.

    Just an FYI regarding the coronavirus, but my main concern isn't so much myself in this situation (being young & healthy), but the possibility of contracting the virus and exposing it to others with a weakened immune system.
    Very well put. You're both wrong, two wrongs don't make a right. Also it sounds like you were having this heated discussion on text -bad idea.

    My son is 11. Husband and I in our 50s. Not immunocompromised, not living in one of the worst cities but not the best. My son is having a hard time getting it -he's "angry" at the virus - of course -his overnight trip , a bday party (probably our upcoming spring break trip), etc all cancelled - and I'm not letting him meet up with friends or do more than take a nature walk with social distancing, etc. He's 11. He's handling it but like he tells me "I'm just a kid" when I get irritated at his ahem communication "skills". He also says lately when I tell him I am frustrated "I feel you, Mommy". Yes, he sometimes walks off in a huff in response to "no you can't have screen time right now" but honestly he quickly returns to be close again. So I ask you -is it better to be right or to be close? I mean putting aside that I think your attitude is wrong and potentially dangerous especially to others - think about your tone and your method of communicating and what your goal is. Be right or be close? And be with someone who strongly prefers the latter as opposed to blocking you like a child or cabin-fevered tween.

  7. #16
    Gold Member East4's Avatar
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    OP, why do you feel the need to put your boyfriend down and mock at him? Your condescending behavior would be unpleasant to anybody. You basically implied that he is stupid by laughing at him for not knowing things. Unless he works in the medical field he is not obligated to be an expert in viruses. How would you feel if you chat about cars, and he is mocking you for not knwoing the basics? Not nice, right?

  8. #17
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Most governments are making it law that establishments close their doors because people like the Op who only think of themselves don't voluntarily stay away. There is a very good reason why bars and restaurants and gyms and other such places are closed and locked.

    As for the maturity level... they both are about par there and I as I've said, they should block one another permanently... The b/f may not know everything about the virus but he knew enough to be right in telling her to self isolate and stay away from gatherings of any kind. Every government has been telling us the same thing.

    P.S. .... and what jman said.

  9. #18
    Gold Member angrythoughts's Avatar
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    OP: ď I said I donít necessarily feel too concerned about the virus as the survival rate is good especially for someone of my age and health. Plus, I live alone and itís not like im endagering my parents, etc.Ē

    She said sheís not concerned. She does not say she doesnít care at all. She also didnít say sheís gonna go outside and make sure she comes into direct contact with everyone she sees. Sheís not concerned. Not being concerned doesnít mean sheís taking zero precautions. Iím sure a lot of you guys are the ones that panic bought all the toilet paper (rude) and again, just because sheís not panicking and staying to a corner by herself in her apt (which she stated she lives alone in) doesnít mean sheís going out there and being reckless.

    She asked for advice about her bf. I think it would be appropriate to keep outside opinions to yourself and stick to the topic of WHAT SHOULD SHE DO when it comes to her bf/relationship. Iím sure a lot of people are out of work until further notice and have the time today, but letís be nice and respectful.

  10. #19
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Thank you for your opinion. Yours differs from mine is all.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Another case of toilet paper panic 🧻😱
    Originally Posted by angrythoughts
    Iím sure a lot of you guys are the ones that panic bought all the toilet paper (rude)

    letís be nice and respectful.

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