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Thread: My boyfriend rarely has sex with me and masturbates weekly

  1. #1

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    My boyfriend rarely has sex with me and masturbates weekly

    We have been dating for one year. We moved in together and immediately I noticed he wouldnít try to have sex with me. I would try to touch him at night or during the day and he would say not right now or sometimes grab my hand and say no. I donít feel like I bother him for it much. On rare occasions he will try to wake me up for boring morning sex, itís the type of sex where men are just trying to get theirs off , he doesnít foreplay, he doesnít give me oral sex, the sex is so bad and Iím dreading it hoping he gets off of me during this time. He takes long to cum or sometimes doesnít. I noticed that he does look up girls on social media ďtwerking or just pornĒ so I know what heís doing which bothers me. I asked him is it me he says no but also says I want you to be more freaky, lol remind you I try to give him oral, I ride him,do any position he asks for, i offer anal,foreplay and he isnít in to it much. I keep offering to break up because I have needs to and he breaks down and cries and says he doesnít want to and will change but doesnít. Iíve gotten to the point that I shut down my sexual desire for him knowing he goes online and looks for girls to jerk off to. Iím not unattractive, I weigh 113 , I have a nice shape and butt for a skinny girl, Iím mixed race, pretty because I go places and men and women compliment me,Iím clean with my hygiene, Iím independent & Iím 30 yrs old and I really love having good sex. I would think I have all the qualities. Heís a good man he is kind and helpful around the house, helps me cook from time to time and caring but the sex issue is so bad I donít know if I should put my foot down for good and leave and find someone who will have a normal sex life and relationship with me. I want to feel wanted by a man again I miss that from my past. What should I do?

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. How were things before you moved in? Why did you move in so soon? He doesn't want to change. You need to reflect if you want to throw your life away on someone who rejects you sexually. Stop having "boring morning sex".
    Originally Posted by Shysms89
    We moved in together and immediately I noticed he wouldnít try to have sex with me.

    I keep offering to break up because I have needs to and he breaks down and cries and says he doesnít want to and will change but doesnít.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Sorry about all this. Can I ask how long you were dating before moving in? Did this issue come about after moving in, or has your sex life always been lacking, in your eyes?

    All in all, this sounds like an awfully lot of disconnect and discontentment for a relationship that's just getting started. Guess that's why I'm trying to understand if this is a new issue or one that you were once able to overlook.

  4. #4
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    How was the sex before moving in? Does he ever give foreplay or oral?

    If a man tried to have sex without any stimulation, there would be no more sex. He sounds incredibly selfish.

    "helpful around the house, helps me cook from time to time " Shouldn't it be 50%.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    Seems like the answer is quite obvious - end this misery and move on to dating someone who is more on par with you sexually.

    On a side note and a disclaimer as I'm not a guy, but what I understand is that for some guys, if they get too much into self help, actual sex becomes undesirable and doesn't feel good. What I'm getting at is that this is nothing to do with you, your looks, or what you are offering in bed. This is ALL him and if he wanted to improve his sex life, he'd stop the jerking off and give himself a chance to normalize for lack of a better word. He will cry and plead, but just like any other addict, he isn't actually willing to change and his addiction is his own hand.

  7. #6

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    We did move in fast because I had gotten pregnant after being told by doctors I wouldnít be able to conceive. But I lost the baby after we moved in due to miscarriage. We use to have sex every time when I would visit him at his place, 2-3 times a weeks and sometimes more.

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    Thanks

    Thank you, i have read about that before

  9. #8

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    No he doesnít give me oral at all, itís weird because my past relationships I would receive oral all the time and foreplay. I thought men loved that

  10. #9

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    Itís an issue that happened when we moved in together or I guess as some say you donít really know someone until you live with them?

  11. #10
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Shysms89
    Itís an issue that happened when we moved in together or I guess as some say you donít really know someone until you live with them?
    You didn't know him well enough at all before deciding to move in. Now you know the "real" him. It's up to you if you want a lifetime of sex his way, only when he wants it.

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