My mom said she regrets having me

This is more of me venting.

But my mother told me yesterday if she knew how I’d turn out, she wouldn’t have had me.

Can’t get it out of my mind.

All I want is to be successful to retire them. My parents are the only reason I don’t end it all.

I don’t really know what to do

My mother used to tell me I had a face only a mother could. Nice, eh? Thing is, she didnt love me.

I cut her out of my life a long time ago. You may need to do the same with your mother.

How old are you? Living at home? If so, can you move out?

I'm very sorry, givinguponme. Don't give up on yourself.

Prove her wrong to yourself and know you are valued and worthy.

Never stoop to her level and argue. Remain above it.

Head held high. You will get through this and don't allow her venom to get you down. You're better than that. Always show class. YOU are a good, very decent person!

Surround yourself with sound, very moral people. Don't make your parents your whole world.

You need to put the phone down on her.

This is more of me venting.

But my mother told me yesterday if she knew how I’d turn out, she wouldn’t have had me.

Can’t get it out of my mind.

All I want is to be successful to retire them. My parents are the only reason I don’t end it all.

I don’t really know what to do

I commented I had a feeling a lot of this started with your parents (my post didn’t post for some reason) so this doesn’t surprise me.

Sometimes even though you love them keeping them close does more harm than good.

It might be best to get a little distance, just to work on yourself and heal.

I'm very sorry. That is a beyond hurtful, horrible, unforgivable thing to say to your child.

Obviously, I have no idea why she would say this, but I want you to know, that she must have a very deep rooted, serious problem, created out of tremendous abuse/trauma of some form or extreme mental illness.

The only this you can do is save yourself. Get away from her. Build a life for yourself with your chosen family and tribe.

I would not allow her to hurt me again or subject any children or dear ones of your own to her.

As the saying goes, a life well lived, is the best revenge.

((hug))

Look, I obviously don't know how your relationship with your parents is. Therefore, what I'm about to say is just a guess. It seems to me that your mother hasn't come to terms with the fact that you committed misdemeanour's in the past and with the consequences those situations brought to you and them as parents.

So, that's probably why she said something quite hurtful. As much as those words sting, please do the hardest thing possible: let that comment of hers go. You are moving forward. That's your focus! Nothing or no one shall distract you from progressing further in life.

In the meantime, consider it best to temporarily limit your contact with her; in other words, respectfully enforce some boundaries. Loving your mum doesn't mean you have to tolerate comments like the above.

Above all, keep moving forward!

I haven't read your other post so I'm wondering why she would say, "if she knew how you have turned out" Have you had a non nurturing parent(s)? Have you been in a lot of trouble?

Why do YOU think she would say such a "I've-given-up-on-you" kind of statement?

We need more details....what does she mean "how you turned out" what happened that makes her say something negative like that. TBH I don't think she means it, sounds to me she's angry at something you did.

My mother said they same thing.. But then in the end she told me she didnt mean it but it still hurt to hear.

try not to think to much of it she was probley just really angry at the moment.

Has she ever talked to you like this before? Did something just happened to her that would make her say that to you, and she's deflecting? How is her relationship with her own parents?

Sometimes, parents can be bullies. Don't enable it. Okay to take a break from her.

This kind of rubbish is hurtful, enormously hurtful, especially from someone who you could reasonably hope to love you.

However, you need to recognise that this is not about you, but about HER. What she's saying, by implication, is that you're not doing what she wants you to do. With some parents, what they actually want is never actually made clear, so trying to please them is a total mind ****. Parents who tell their children they're inadequate are basically saying that they themselves are inadequate.

Keep her at a distance, and surround yourself with people who love you just the way you are. You owe her nothing, including contact at the expense of your self-esteem and wellbeing.