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Thread: Friends with Benefits?

  1. #1

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    Friends with Benefits?

    i have a friend whom i will have known for two years this january. the friendship started off as one sided on his part because he kept pursuing me, and i was not interested because hes in ohio and im in florida. long story short, we ended up talking almost every day and he would face time me almost every night (sometimes wed get intimate) and hes always concerned about my well being and wants to know everything about me. i ended up falling for him hard, and ive told him, but he doesnt feel the same. however, he still seeks me out and hypes me up and sends me mixed signals. i dont know if i should remove him from my life, because i really dont want to. i love him a lot and its painful thinking about letting him go, but its also painful knowing he doesn’t love me back.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. Don't be a free sexual webcam service. Block and delete him from all social media, messaging services and devices. Date local men.
    Originally Posted by thxxi
    hes in ohio and im in florida. long story short, we ended up talking almost every day and he would face time me almost every night (sometimes wed get intimate)

  3. #3
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    If he doesn't feel the same and you feel he is just enjoying the flattery then he's not a real friend. If you don't want to hear about him dating others if that happens, you really can't be his friends. I think he understandably cooled off his feelings for you when you declined to date him in the past.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    You don't want to lose him from your life because you apparently have nothing going on in your real life, besides a superficial cyber-going-nowhere thing.

    You only have so much limited time and emotional energy to pour into anyone, so as long as you're pouring it into someone who doesn't deserve this attention, it will prevent you from finding a local companion.

    Delete him from ever contacting you again and spend your precious time joining Meetup.com groups for single people in your age group. It's a great stress-free way to get out into the real world, enjoying activities and possibly meeting dating prospects.

    You've wasted 2 years on something that's going nowhere. Picture how with a local guy, you can actually be holding hands, enjoying meals together, and having a companion to actually enjoy life with. Set a goal and it will happen, eventually. Don't ever be so desperate, though, that you don't have standards. Make a must-have list, along with a dealbreaker list, and stick to it. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

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  6. #5
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    You need to let him go. This will become more and more painful, as he does not feel the same. He likes the ego boost. Not a friend and quite selfish!

    Do you have a social life and friends? You have invested so much into this non existent relationship. Stop wasting your life!

    Date someone you can actually have a local and real relationship with.
    Last edited by Hollyj; 11-25-2019 at 10:28 AM.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    As others have suggested, most long distance relationships don't work out.

  8. #7
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    Have you met in person yet?

  9. #8

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    we havent, but he has family near my area and weve talked about meeting before so the possibility is there im just not sure it will ever happen

  10. #9
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Ok he's stringing you along. He may be married/live with someone. Get on dating apps and talk to men you can meet in a timely manner.
    Originally Posted by thxxi
    we havent

  11. #10
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    Originally Posted by thxxi
    we havent, but he has family near my area and weve talked about meeting before so the possibility is there im just not sure it will ever happen
    What a waste of your life. Other than living on another planet, I cannot understand why you haven't met?

    How can you love someone you haven't even met? Plus, he does not have feelings for you.

    Do you have any social life?

    There is nothing to let go of.

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