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Ex engaged a month into new relationship!


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Hey,

 

I feel what you feel. I'm sorry... and that ing sucks. If you're looking for some advice, here it is:

 

Sounds like a nasty breakup or relationship. Doesn't seem like he knows what he's doing, or if he does, and is not doing a good job being a communicative person about it. Either way, it's not good for you is it? He's clearly doing things that make you hurt. At least for right now, he might not be in the right mindset to be a good person to you.

 

Obviously, you could fear the worst, and it might be true, or it might not. Either way, make sure to take care and love yourself.

 

Stay strong,

 

P

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most times we generally are not in control of our behaviour after a breakup, things can turn ugly disrespectful and communications can be very difficult, you see a side of your ex which you never had before. Your best option is to take care of yourself, your well being, so find the courage to focus on yourself, eat well, go out with your friends, family do what you love to do. Cut him off until you feel better and all these things dont bother you anymore. Stay strong!

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My ex and I were together 6 years. We broke up and he got into another relationship with a 22 year old he is 18 a month into that relationship they got engaged they have now been together about 3 months. Is it a rebound?

 

I suspect he was seeing her while with you and they've actually "been together" a lot longer than 3 months. Your ex sounds like an idiot at 18. Be glad he's her problem now. Engaged at 18 to a 22 year old? pffft.

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It's best to walk away rather than hope "it's a rebound" and he'll come back. Get out more. Focus on school, grades, getting into university, sports, clubs, groups and other interests. Hang out with your friends. Do all the things that being stuck 6 yrs (since he was 12?- was he even through puberty yet?) have prevented you from.

My ex and I were together 6 years he is 18 . Is it a rebound?
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Oh he has explored we had a couple months break at one point.

 

Two months isn't enough for a guy who has been part of a couple since he was 12.

 

I went to high school with a girl who dated the same guy from age 14 to age 21. He proposed when she was about 18, she said yes, the wedding plans went forward. Two weeks before the wedding she called it off. She realized it wasn't very healthy for her to limit herself to one guy at such a young age. It's a shame it took her so long and he was crushed, but she knew she couldn't tie herself to him when she'd had no other experience.

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What are you hoping for here? That his new relationship turns out to be a hot mess? That if it does lead to marriage it's an awful marriage? That he gets this out of system sooner than later, and "rebounds" back to you?

 

I'm very sorry for the pain you're in right now. Breakups suck. But whatever choices he's making right now—well, those are his choices, his path, not a verdict on you or whatever you guys shared, good and bad, over your six years together.

 

What do you want your path to look like? I'd focus on that right now, and try to find strength and peace there, rather than in wondering about him and wishing things don't work out. That's just a path toward bitterness.

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It doesn't matter whether it's a rebound or not. Yes, based on the timing it sounds like a rebound. But he could actually end up marrying her. Or break up and get with someone else. Or pack up and immigrate to the North Pole. So what? At 18 he is liable to make all kinds of mistakes and random things but none of it has anything to do with you anymore. He is not doing it to spite you. It's just him carrying on with his life. In the meantime you are keeping yourself stuck by focusing on him, someone who is no longer part of your life. The sooner you stop monitoring what he does, the sooner you wil be free to get your life back. Accept the break up. It HAS happened and it couldn't have played out another way or it would have. Let go.

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