Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 19 of 19

Thread: Time to end the relationship?

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Posts
    2,387
    Originally Posted by mrbreezer
    I am not worried about the kids being top priority. I understand that.

    I am more concerned with her not being over her ex, even though he seems to have moved on past her. I just want to make sure that I am not alone in my thinking.
    She's not over her ex. She still displays his photo in her bedroom. What does that tell you? Also, she can't wait to tell her ex's fiance about his past cheating. She's very preoccupied with her ex and you're just on the side. She doesn't take you seriously. Yes, time to end it.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    23,056
    Gender
    Female
    How long ago since her divorce was finalized?

  3. #13
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    10,495
    Originally Posted by mrbreezer
    One morning when I spent the night, she said that he sees my vehicle at her house (when he has the kids he drops them off nearby for school bus pickup), and she wonder's what he thinks about me sleeping with his wife
    Except - she isn't his wife anymore. Yikes.

    She has not mentally accepted that the marriage is over and that they are divorced. She's sadly deluding herself because she's not ready to face the painful truth that he is long-gone. Other men she's dated are not insecure about her ex - they correctly assess that she is clinging to him and not in any place to date. She's in serious denial about the divorce and deflects by getting angry.

    This isn't going to end well for you if you stick around. She is a long way from over him.

  4. #14
    Gold Member Spawn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Heaven
    Posts
    766
    Gender
    Male
    Yes, you are right, will need to move on from this.
    She is clearly not ready to date or be in a relationship

  5.  

  6. #15
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    39,518
    Gender
    Male
    Sorry to hear this. 12 weeks is a good time to reassess and decide things. In this case there seems to be a tractor-trailer of TMI and baggage from the get-go. She needs a therapist not a bf. Just make a kind but clean break.
    Originally Posted by mrbreezer
    Her ex husband cheated on her while she was pregnant with the second child. They tried to work it out for 6 years after the affair, but he continued to cheat and they divorced.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    California
    Age
    56
    Posts
    8,018
    Gender
    Male
    Welcome to ENA as a poster.

    I wish any of us could tell you it will get better but we all know it will not. It sucks because it is so hard to meet someone that you are attracted to, checks all your boxes and seems to have their life together only to discover that past is ruining any chance at a happy and healthy future.

    Since there is no way you can help her see that she is still hung up on her ex the only option is to end things with her. Do it in a very nice way with no incrimination's since other guys have already tried and failed. Make a clean break and start the search once again...

    Lost

  8. #17
    Thanks for all the reassurance. There were other things happening too in addition to this. Like the pushing and pulling away. It was driving me crazy. I kinda thought she may be a commitment phobic.

    Anyways I ended it tonight, it didn't go well. She said not nice things, I said not nice things. She said I was attacking her, and I told her it was best we do not communicate anymore. I left her house and then she texted me asking if I felt better about myself for attacking her, and she expected more. I replied that she was childish and please don't contact me anymore.

  9. #18
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    N/A
    Posts
    2,799
    Originally Posted by mrbreezer
    Thanks for all the reassurance. There were other things happening too in addition to this. Like the pushing and pulling away. It was driving me crazy. I kinda thought she may be a commitment phobic.

    Anyways I ended it tonight, it didn't go well. She said not nice things, I said not nice things. She said I was attacking her, and I told her it was best we do not communicate anymore. I left her house and then she texted me asking if I felt better about myself for attacking her, and she expected more. I replied that she was childish and please don't contact me anymore.
    I am glad she was an ass about it. Confirms instantly that you did the right thing.

    I do think in some ways people who married very young, can be immature. Its like being with someone from such a young age stunts some growth. I've experienced that in both platonic and romantic relationships. Of course, its not true of everyone.

  10. #19
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    1,123
    Gender
    Male
    Well done OP you have saved yourself a lot of drama and heartache and now free to find someone who really wants and deserves you.

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Videos


Wedding Jitters Could Be a Predictor for a Future Divorce

Botox Fights Depression And Makes You Feel Happier

Men Are More Sensitive than Women when Having Relationship Problems

Friendship Between Men and Women Often Involves Attraction

Infidelity

Most Women Rather Not Date Unemployed Men
Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •