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Thread: Broke up with my best friend

  1. #1
    Silver Member Piaresssss's Avatar
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    Broke up with my best friend

    So I had this best friend for 4 years and we ended up in a relationship. It lasted less than two months. We worked as best friends but not as boyfriend and girlfriend.

    She ended it but I am not sad. I have cried but I feel like that is because I wanna go back to what we where before rather than crash and burn as a couple and she agrees.

    I'm not really sure why I am writing this because I'm not really looking for advice just getting my thoughts out.

    I think in reality I was not in love with her. I love the girl to bits and she means so much to me. The word friend doesn't even apply to what we where to each other. She was my family.

    Think I'm scared of losing that with her.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    It will be fine if you can both go back to a platonic friendship.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    It's normal to have a time of no contact and separation to adjust. Once time has passed and the residual of the relationship dissipates, you both will most likely revisit the friendship. So don't fear, it will work out.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    The problem is, will a new girlfriend accept this friendship, when you've slept with a woman you're hanging out with and communicating with? I wouldn't be dating a guy who had a friend like this. She will likely experience the same, and who will she choose when the time comes? Her new bf or her friend? Crossing that line changes everything.

    Very close male/female friendships happen in youth, and usually have an expiration date. There's a different dynamic there, and it's not conducive when a person is entering a serious relationship with a love interest. Some very free-spirited, open-minded, accepting people are okay with their significant other have a best friend of the opposite sex, but they are in the minority. None of my friends or relatives are in this situation.

    Life is not for sissies. Unfortunately stress and sadness exist in a lifetime, but fortunately there's also plenty of joy mixed in.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
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    Give it time. You may find things circle back.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    I had a friendship like that. We dated and broke up.

    We did become friends again. But, I think our motives were different.

    I honestly wanted to be friends with him. He secretly wanted to get back together and thought that he could wait me out.

    I resisted all of his attempts and he eventually found some reason to become indignant with me.

    Literally, "You chose your mom over me."

    Damn right, dude. She helped you get a car, you ran it into the ground, lost your job, stopped making payments, and abandoned it. What did you think I was going to do?

    (After he got evicted, my first question was, "Where is my mom's car?" instead of asking if he was ok.)

    He moved away and has't spoken to me for probably probably 15 years.

    Our friendship had probably lasted 10 years, before that.

    It happens.

  8. #7
    Silver Member Piaresssss's Avatar
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    I was actually out with her the other night. It felt like it was before we got together. Laughing and joking with out all the pressure the relationship put on us.

    Somethings are gonna change which is natural but it's nice to know we are gonna be fine


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