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Thread: Ex unblocked me after 5+ years

  1. #21
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    Now he's unblocked you, you can instantly block him. Drama solved. Something tells me you don't want that though.

  2. #22
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    Doesn't matter. It's social media, not reality. The only person who has any power to decide whether or not it matters is you. So that leaves you with the question does it, or doesn't it? In all honesty, it shouldn't. It shouldn't be worth a second thought to you because the truth is, it's not. Not at all.

  3. #23
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    OP, lots of folk have advised you to block this ex yourself. Are you going to let us know if you've done this and if not, what's stopping you?

  4. #24
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    I haven't checked up on him, he was on my timeline for the first time in years. We have a lot of mutual friends so it's not exactly easy to miss. It prompted me to check other social media because I didn't know if FB just unblocks people automatically after a certain amount of time.

    I don't want anything to do with him and won't block him unless he becomes a problem. Right now I'm getting on with my life and he's getting on with his and I have no issues - so I won't block because that comes across as a bit petty imo after all this time. UNLESS he strikes up conversation or starts snooping on me (looking at stories etc where I can tell).

    I don't think about him from one day to the next, I just got a bit concerned because he moved so close to my family that even THEY got worried. I don't want this to be another step he takes to potentially weasel his way into my life. If things stay normal I won't care, but I will block if anything comes of this.

    In short, I'm indifferent if there's no intent behind it. I haven't blocked anyone on social media because I don't feel the need unless they're harassing me and so far he has not.

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  6. #25
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    However you claim this and his move are problems. Why maintain a toxic liaison? Are you happy in your marriage? What is the point of exes orbiting you?
    Originally Posted by Jay98
    won't block him unless he becomes a problem.

  7. #26
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    You're not indifferent.

    He won't even know you've blocked him so it's not "petty". And even if he does know...who cares????

  8. #27
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    However you claim this and his move are problems. Why maintain a toxic liaison? Are you happy in your marriage? What is the point of exes orbiting you?
    Yes I am happy and would never in a million years get involved with an ex again. They didn't work for a reason.

  9. #28
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Jay98
    I don't want anything to do with him and won't block him unless he becomes a problem. Right now I'm getting on with my life and he's getting on with his and I have no issues - so I won't block because that comes across as a bit petty imo after all this time. UNLESS he strikes up conversation or starts snooping on me (looking at stories etc where I can tell)
    I'm sorry, but it's hard not to see you posting about this as evidence that he is a problem.

    There is no shame in admitting that someone can rattle our spirit, and taking the steps required to protect our spirit. That is genuine strength and self-empowerment. You, at least in my opinion, seem to be operating from a place of pride, wanting to prove two somewhat contradictory and self-sabotaging ideas: that you can handle this and that he wants to weasel his way into your life. That is weakness posturing as strength.

    Your attitude about all this is about as far from indifferent as one can get. No, he is not "harassing" you, not yet, and I don't suspect he will. I doubt you reside in his mind with the same level of inflammation as he resides in yours. But you are, in ways, harassing yourself by even entertaining a story that he might harass you and actively taking steps to see if that story gets realized.

    Blocking is only "petty" if you are more concerned about what the blocked person thinks about you than what is best, truly, for your own peace of mind.

  10. #29
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    I'm sorry, but it's hard not to see you posting about this as evidence that he is a problem.

    There is no shame in admitting that someone can rattle our spirit, and taking the steps required to protect our spirit. That is genuine strength and self-empowerment. You, at least in my opinion, seem to be operating from a place of pride, wanting to prove two somewhat contradictory and self-sabotaging ideas: that you can handle this and that he wants to weasel his way into your life. That is weakness posturing as strength.

    Your attitude about all this is about as far from indifferent as one can get. No, he is not "harassing" you, not yet, and I don't suspect he will. I doubt you reside in his mind with the same level of inflammation as he resides in yours. But you are, in ways, harassing yourself by even entertaining a story that he might harass you and actively taking steps to see if that story gets realized.

    Blocking is only "petty" if you are more concerned about what the blocked person thinks about you than what is best, truly, for your own peace of mind.
    I agree with Bluecastle. Ever hear the phrase "Doth protest too much"?

    If you and your family were concerned about his move, then that's reason enough to block and not petty at all.

    Seems like you created this drama for reasons only you know. Feeling nervous of someone's intentions, but not blocking due to appearances seem conflicting emotions to me. And then when many on this forum suggest blocking, you really double down on your reasons not to.

    You want him to contact you, you will enjoy the drama and gossip it creates, bc it will prove your secret desire that he still is thinking of you.

    However, it seems to be quite the opposite. You are thinking of him. He isn't doing anything... Even if he changed his settings... it could have nothing to do with you specifically. And if he really is a horrible, dangerous person and you wanted nothing to do with him, it'd be a no brainer to block him.

    I block people all the time. Its great! lol and if my ex mysteriously unblocked me, bonus! hurry up and block them. It might even add a little pep, in my petty little step. lmao...

    get real, gf. you like the idea he could contact you.

  11. #30
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    Originally Posted by Jay98
    Yes I am happy and would never in a million years get involved with an ex again. They didn't work for a reason.
    So you've blocked him now and ended all this?

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